


Hate is a Strong Word

by Kneekeyta



Category: My Mad Fat Diary
Genre: F/M, Friends to Lovers, Lovers to Friends, Smut, Sooo Much Smut, idk - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-24
Updated: 2019-10-24
Packaged: 2021-01-02 03:27:56
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 28,564
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21154850
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kneekeyta/pseuds/Kneekeyta





	Hate is a Strong Word

“I should have never agreed to come here.” Rae mumbled to herself. She sipped on her beer examining the growing crowd around her. It was just a bunch of the knob-heads from school, she was glad to be rid of that place. The only thing the party had going was that the music was halfway decent, she’s not surprised though. It was Chop or the lesser known Arnold Peters who was hosting and he had alright enough taste. She bobbed her head along when suddenly the music changed, she jerked her head around to find the source of this atrocity and when she spotted him she didn’t even try to contain her annoyed groan.

Stomping over she grabbed him by the elbow, him being Finn Nelson, arrogant prick. “What are you doing putting that shit on?”

He rolled his head back in annoyance, “Look May, I’m in charge. I can play what I want.”

“Put on something else!” she snapped at him.

“Nope.” He popped with a cocky grin.

“No one likes this shit.”

“Seems to me you’re the one who doesn’t like it. Just don’t know good music.” He looked around her and she twisted her head seeing people moving to it.

“Fuckin’ mindless idiots, like you.” She whipped around and stomped off knowing it was a losing battle.

She went to find Izzy to tell her she can’t stay, that she’s sorry and she knows she was supposed to be her wing-woman for the night but that she absolutely cannot put up with the music or Finn the prick Nelson right now. Wandering through the house she didn’t have to look far, she found Izzy with Chloe and told them she was headed off, they pleaded with her to stay but she declined. When she got outside she pulled on her jacket and adjusted her hair and made to set off home.

“Leaving so soon?”

Only about five steps from the house she turned to see the prick himself leaning against the wall of the house, one leg bent back resting against the brick of the house, a lit cigarette dangling from his lips.

“Yeah.” She said in the best ‘what’s it to you’ tone she could muster.

He took a slow drag off the cigarette, his eyes locked on hers then tilted his head back blowing the smoke into the night air, when his eyes met hers again he flicked the butt and pushed off the wall taking a few steps towards her.

“Meet me at mine in twenty.” He swiftly spoke before heading back towards the house.

–

She has no idea how this happened; well she does know HOW it happened she just doesn’t know why they’re letting it continue. They can’t stand each other, can barely be in each other’s company unless they are completely naked or their mouths are otherwise occupied. Then and only then is when it’s like everything else is forgotten. When it happened the first time it was the last thing she would have expected to happen. A few months ago they were at a party similar to the one she was just at. They had been arguing over music, she had one upped him and he followed her trying to argue and somehow they found themselves in a linen closet his fingers down her pants as she panted into the crook of his neck while he made her cry out in the most exquisite way.

But that still didn’t change the fact that they never got along, and before all this they didn’t really have too, they weren’t in the same circle of friends, he was a year older than her, so it wasn’t like they ever really saw each other. Back when he was in school and she was a first year she’d see him in the halls sometimes, she just wanted to get a look at what all the girls giggled about. They all gagged over him like they needed a fucking bib. She always thought that even though he was easy on the eyes that he probably wasn’t any different from the other twats at school. She’d never really know though, she kept to herself, only talking to Izzy and Chloe. Things did get better when she moved onto year two and the vast majority of twats were no longer attending. She looked up more and talked more openly in the halls.

Two months before school was done and she would be free for the summer she discovered he was in fact a prick; a music snob with a crooked smirk’ overall an eye roll scoff inducing dickhead. They had their first actual encounter at Town Records, and it went from a scrap to shots being fired in a matter of seconds. The next time they had a bit of a go was at the park, she didn’t even want to go to the park but Izzy insisted. Later she found out why, Izzy announced that she had a crush on Chop, or Arnold, works at a garage and Izzy was simply smitten when she went with her dad to have his car detailed. And Chop just so happened to be one of Finn’s best friends, and in an effort to be a supportive friend for Izzy she found herself seeing him a bit more, and being invited out to parties Chop loved hosting. And the first party she ever attended she found herself in the linen closet with Finn.

After that happened she avoided going with Izzy to ogle Chop at the park. But that didn’t last long, as she couldn’t help but give into Izzy’s pouty lips and kitten eyes when asking her along. When Rae would see Finn nothing was ever said about what happened, they bickered a bit was all. So, she hoped he had forgotten or chalked it down to being drunk like she did. However, the second time they were in the same place for longer than a few minutes was a month after the linen incident, it was at his flat warming party. That was the night they first had sex, it was slow and drawn out, and they had to keep quiet because people were in the next room passed out. As soon as they were done she left. The following day when she saw him it was like it was before arguing and bickering her calling him a prick under her breath. It was like they were two different people. She’s not exactly sure how they even agreed to this arrangement they had, no one spoke of anything it was always just ‘meet at mine’ or ‘I have an empty’ and quick fumbles at the pub or parties.

It gave her a rush that went straight down to her clit and she couldn’t help herself, she hated him but her body was drawn to his and everything they did left her in a state of bliss, well until he would speak.

–

Finn hurried up the stairs to his flat, hoping they didn’t have to have the small talk, he just wanted to get right to it. She did mostly too, but sometimes they’d get caught chatting which would domino into rowing in two seconds flat leaving him having to wank it out, that happened on more than one occasion. He’s not sure what is about her but his body aches for her. He often dreams about the time in the cupboard, but it’s never how it really happened. In his dream she wants him to kiss her or she kisses him first.

What really happened is they were arguing in the hall and she was just smiling at him, a shit eating grin, she whipped her hair around saying that she was going to the bathroom, but she had opened the wrong door. He followed her in and turned her around a bit roughly with his hand on her shoulder and he’s not sure what overcame him but he crashed his lips to hers. Originally he had every intention of telling her off but the way she gasped and that way her mouth popped open, her lips plump and wet, he just really couldn’t help himself. And then she was rubbing her body against him and bunching his shirt up in her fists, well, things just progressed. Until finally she was crying into his shoulder as she came undone around his fingers. 

She was there, leaning against the wall waiting, he passed her and opened his door and walked in shrugging off his coat, she shut the door and he didn’t give her time to say anything he backed her against the door kissing her roughly. He pulled her coat off her and let it drop to the floor. He unbuttoned her shirt as she went for his jeans. He walked them backwards both fumbling to kick off their shoes. Pulling apart momentarily they each pulled their shirts off, him left in his unbuttoned jeans and her in her skirt and leggings. He pressed his lips to hers again and guided them towards the sofa. He got his jeans halfway down before he sat, he reached up hooking his thumbs around the band of her skirt and leggings pulling them down her legs.

After she pulled them the rest of the way she dropped to her knees and pulled his jeans and boxers off but before discarding them to the side next to hers she reached in his back pocket for a condom and set it next to him. She swirled her tongue around the tip of his cock teasing him before grasping the base. He moaned and bucked slightly as she stroked him in tandem. She took him as far as she could bobbing up and down her left hand cupping his balls, he was close, and she knew it so she withdrew with a slurp. She reached for the condom and used her teeth to open it then rolled it down his length before standing. He helped her to straddle him not yet penetrating her, she sat on his lap, his cock pressing against her bits, he reached around unclasping her bra and pulling it off her. He cupped her tits in his hands, then began squeezing and sucking on them rather roughly. Her hands tangled in his hair tugging slightly, eyes closed and head tilted back breathing shallow breaths. He slid his right hand down her body gliding his fingers over her wetness, rubbing her clit a moment before slipping his fingers inside of her; she rocked against him, her breaths becoming shorter. Bringing her closer to the edge he stopped, removing his fingers and she lifted up to slide him inside her.

They moved slow at first, kissing softly until she started to grind, she pulled away from his lips pressing her chest into his both her hands on the back of the sofa as she moved. His lips went to her neck sucking and nipping as much as he could. He was close, both moaning and groaning, “Fuck” he cried out, his fingers digging into her hips as she moved.

“You know this, for sure.” He stuttered.

She fully stopped and pulled back to look at him, “What?” she asked her face screwed up.

“What?” he replied in confusion.

“What does that mean?”

“N-nothing, just y’know, that you know how to do…this.” he looked down at their connected bodies and then back up at her.

“And what? It’s all I’m good for?” she fumed and lifted up to un-straddle him.

“No.” he said holding her firmly to him.

“I meant just you know…what I said about not knowing music earlier.” He stammered.

“Right.” She stated flatly.

“Can we please stop talking and finish?”

“Whatever.” Rae said and started moving again.

She grinded down hard into him and he yelped, she was back to holding the sofa and moving as fast as she could to get him to come, when his fingers clenched she knew he was close and as soon as he scrunched his eyes and his fingers curled again, she un-straddled him just enough to let his cock slide out, she adjusted quickly and her right hand went to her cunt her fingers rubbing at her clit.

“What the fuuuuu..?” Finn trailed off in question. He looked down at her rubbing her clit, she rubbed insistently as her left hand tugged on his hair, she pulled his head back moaning as she came, as soon as it calmed she stood.

He was in shock as she gathered her clothes and was pulling them on, he couldn’t even register what was happening, when she was dressed she said, “Later.” and left. He was still sat on his sofa, he looked down at his hard cock and her juices glistening off him, it took him a moment but he pulled the condom off to finish himself.

Yet, another time where his words get all fucked up and another time she leaves him alone to finish the job.

She couldn’t help but smile as she walked home, the arrogant prick. Whatever, it’s not like she won’t see him tomorrow sometime, she thought. Or maybe she would let him stew for a bit. Tucking into bed she had mischievous grin on her face thinking over what her next move should be.

–

She knows he had spotted her as soon as he walked in and made his way to the back of the shop. They always seem to know when the other is around, even if it’s sometimes ignored. He was flipping through the B’s when she sidled up next to him.

“That was some shit you pulled the other day.” Finn mumbled to Rae, she hadn’t seen him in a few days and that he must have figured out she was pissed about what he said. Which she was right to be.

She smirked to herself as she restacked the cds, “Well, see what happens when you don’t know how to use your words.” She mused playfully.

“Piss off.” He grumbled.

It was a bit of a low blow, she knows he does have trouble expressing himself verbally from the few times he’s not been a dickhead, “Okay.” She shrugged and went to make her way back to the front of the shop where Izzy and Chloe were looking at the new releases. But she had only gotten one step away and he caught her elbow, he pulled her towards the storage room and she did her best to contain her giggle. She did love pissing him off.

He pulled her in and shut the door, he kissed her roughly then picked her up setting her on to the desk, her legs parting immediately. He slid his hand under her skirt, “fucking leggings.” He grunted, he tried to get his hand under the band but it was to no avail, “Fuck it.” He mumbled. Then tore a hole in the crotch.

“Finn!” She scolded him.

“What?” he answered annoyed.

“I still have two hours left of work.”

“Then let’s hurry this up.”

He pulled her panties aside and rubbed her clit while he kissed along her neck, she gripped the back of his shirt trying to contain her moans, while he slid his fingers inside of her, her head dropped back and she relished in the way he was able to make her come undone so quickly. When she was close she dove her head into the crook of his neck whimpering. When he slid his fingers out she pushed him back slightly and slipped off the desk to her knees.

She got his jeans down enough to get his cock out, then looked up at him while she stroked him, his eyes were already shut and he was biting his lower lip. As she licked the tip and around his ridge he released a shuddering breath. She then sucked the very tip lightly while stroking him, then slowly took more of him in her mouth, before she slid her hand to cup his balls causing him to shudder. He put one hand on the back of her head the other on her shoulder, she started to suck harder and take him deeper, his fingers tightening in her hair, he would thrust at times but she could feel him tensing trying to control the urge. She sighed internally and pulled away, “Thrust.” She said then took him back in her mouth. If it was going to make him finish quicker then by all means, she thought.

She looked up at him his eyes wide and mouth open, she moved her mouth on him while looking at him, and finally she gripped his hip and guided him to gently thrust, he moaned and his head fell back his other hand going to the back of her head. It wasn’t fast, it was slow paced and then she dropped her hand to cup his balls again. He’d thrust fast then slow to draw it out, after a moment he stopped. “I wanna finish inside you.” He panted.

Wiping her mouth off she stood and sat back on the desk, he stepped between her legs, and reached in his back pocket, he pulled a condom out and ripped the foil pack open with his teeth, after rolling it down his length, he pulled her panties aside once again, she watched as his cock disappeared under her skirt, he moaned as he was fully in, “Quickly.” She said. He nodded and began to thrust. She wrapped her legs around him and was already feeling herself build. He held tightly onto her, his mouth on her neck, hot and damp as he panted. She slid her hands around his back and gripped tightly on to his shirt as she came once again crying out softly into his shoulder, seconds later he shuddered and felt his own release. He waited a moment then pulled out of her whipping off the condom and tossing it in the bin before pulling his jeans up tucking himself away.

He let out a tired breath, “I’ll go first.” He said. She nodded.

But before he opened the door she said, “I have an empty Saturday.”

Pausing he asked, “Same time?”

“Yeah.”

“See you later then.” He relied, then left shutting the door behind him.

Luckily the extra loo roll was in there so she cleaned herself up and readjusted her clothes and properly hid the used condom by bunching up some old adverts and throwing them on top.

There was a knock on the door, “Rae?”

She opened the door quickly, “Hey, sorry was just checking things.” Rae smiled at Izzy.

“Oh, that’s okay, did you see Finn was here?”

“Oh no, I hadn’t noticed.” She shrugged.

“I know you don’t like him but Chop says he’s a good guy.”

“That so.” Rae hummed and stepped out of the room.

“Yeah, also at the end of summer Chop invited us to go camping.” She grinned sweetly.

“Oh, so that’s what you’re after, you want me to go with you.”

Izzy’s face scrunched up in desperation, “Chloe already said no, that there was no way she would go camping, and I can’t go by myself, there is no way my mum and dad will let me go but if you go I might be able to.”

Izzy was pouting now, and Rae couldn’t resist her little desperate face, “You’re lucky I love you Iz.” She sighed.

“Really?” Izzy gasped in excitement, her features instantly changing. 

“Yeah, as long as my mum says its fine and your parents as well, mind you.”

“Thanks Rae!” she screeched engulfing her in a hug.

“Yeah, yeah.”

Izzy bounced off towards Chloe, they waved at Rae saying they would see her later. She waved them off watching them leave then went back to re-stacking.

—-

A few paces away from the record shop Finn reached into his jeans for his tobacco tin, he pulled out a pre-rolled cigarette and lit it as he continued to walk on. He felt better than he had in days, the tension that was building was finally released. His body felt more relaxed and so did his mind. He knew he had fucked up saying what he did but it just slipped out, a heat of the moment type of thing. He knows he deserved her ignoring him for the better part of three days; that being the longest they’d gone since this whole little arrangement of theirs started. He’d went to the pub a few times but she wasn’t there and the times that he had went to the record shop there would be too many people in there. But he knew it’s what he had coming.

“Hiya Finn.”

He came to an abrupt halt as Stacey bounced in front of him, he mumbled a hello. Not wanting to make idle chit chat he maneuvered around her to keep towards home but she grasped his elbow, “I got an empty if you’re not busy.” She smiled while biting her lower lip.

“I am busy.” He said and pulled out of her hold. Something about the way she was touching him he didn’t like.

As he walked away she shouted “Another time!” But there would never be another time. She had tried it on with him before it didn’t happen then and it wasn’t going to happen now, or anytime, ever.

—-

The next evening she and Izzy were sat at the pub, Chop had called Izzy that morning saying to gather the troops and meet at 5. She was listening to Izzy rabbit on about Chop and complaining about why he hasn’t made an actual move yet, concerned if he really liked her or not. As Rae tried to reassure her friend everyone started to trickle in, Finn being the first, he took a seat across from, her.

“Hi Finn.” Izzy chirped.

He smiled at her, well, a half attempted smile that made Rae scoff. “Alright, May?” Finn asked with sarcastic smirk.

“Just swell.” She gritted.

Then Chloe bounced in and plopped down next to Finn, “Alright, Finn?” she asked with a smile and a hair flip. He just shrugged. He was such a grump, could never just be polite.

“I saw Archie earlier, is he coming ‘round?” Chloe asked looking around the pub. Everyone just shrugged. Rae knew Archie from when he was in school and figured he must be back from uni visiting for the summer.

“So what were you guys talking about?” Chloe asked.

“Nothing much.” Izzy shrugged.

“So how was work today, Rae?” Chloe asked looking at Rae.

“It was alright, nothing to shout about.” She shrugged.

“I saw you in there yesterday, Finn. Did you get anything interesting?” Chloe asked turning to look at Finn.

“I’m gonna get a drink.” He mumbled and pushed his chair back.

Rae watched him walk away for a second before looking at Izzy who was staring intently at the door.

“I wonder where Chop is?” Izzy said with a sigh.

“I wonder what Finn’s problem is?” Chloe mused.

“I’m sure Chop is just running late at work, he’ll be here don’t worry. And well, Finn’s just a grumpy twat.”

Rae looked up to see Finn was standing just behind his chair and heard what she said, she felt her cheeks go hot, he scoffed and shook his head, he turned on his heel and went to linger by the jukebox.

“I think he heard you, Rae.” Chloe said stunned.

“Well, it’s the truth.” She huffed crossed her arms under her chest. It’s not like that was the worst thing she could have said about him, and it was mostly true. 

Chop came bounding in, and sat next to Izzy muttering his apologies and that he was late from work. He and Izzy started talking and Chloe pulled Rae into a conversation about this boy she might like but isn’t sure yet. Rae nodded and hummed in the appropriate places but couldn’t help let her eyes roam past Chloe’s head to look at Finn briefly. Because the shit he was playing was making her crazy, it was like sad FM she couldn’t take it anymore.

When Chloe paused in the middle of her story saying she’d be right back and headed to the ladies, Rae got up and walked over to the jukebox.

“Are you going to keep playing this crap all night, it’s like someone ran over your puppy.” She tutted, moving him aside a little with a shove of her hip.

“Fuck.” He muttered his beer sloshing some. “I just put money in that.” he muttered.

“I’m sure you can spare it.” She groaned.

But before she could make an attempt at a selection, he pressed a random code. “What the fuck!” she scolded him. But then her lips tugged up into a smile with the opening chords, “I’ll leave you here to listen to what I’m sure is your favorite song at the moment.” She grinned and walked away from him to head outside in the beer garden.

She couldn’t help but chuckle, out every random combo he could have picked he picked Backstreet Boys. Leaning against the wall she squinted into the sky, the sun was just setting. She had just gotten there but wasn’t much in the mood to be bickering with Finn, or staring at a loved up Izzy and Chop and that confusing situation.

As she contemplated going home the door opened, she looked over and rolled her eyes, as Finn approached. “You owe me 20p.” he said matter-of-factly.

“You were the one who picked that song, not me.” She retorted.

“It were an accident! And it’s your fault.”

“No it wasn’t.” she spoke mildly amused.

“Give me my 20p.” he said sternly.

“No.”

“Rae.” he said sternly.

“Oooh so serious.” She teased.

He took a few steps until he was standing right in front of her, “The money please.”

“Not gonna happen.” She spoke trying to contain her laughter.

He sighed tiredly and looked away before looking back at her, he licked over his bottom lip ready to go another round of arguing, “You know it was—“

Kissing him seemed like a good way to shut him up. She was right. He kissed her back after a second and soon had her pressed against the wall of pub. She slid her hand down his chest and over the thick of his jeans, she couldn’t help but smile into their kiss. Rubbing him lightly at first was a good way to tease him, but then she began to unbuckle his belt and jeans, she unzipped his fly and stuck her hand inside his boxers gripping his warm cock. He stuttered a fuck and pulled away from her lips, both of them looking around to make sure no one else was about. She glided her hand quickly over his hard length and smashed her lips to his causing him to groan. He started to pant and involuntarily jerked when she slid her palm across the tip, before stroking him again. He panted hot breaths into her neck and then froze and stuttered a string of fucks as he came gripping her shoulder. She pulled her hand out of his jeans luckily it was come free for the most part. Kissing him lightly on the lips she then made to leave but he pulled her close to him, “You still owe me.” he spoke gruffly in her ear.

“Bill me.” She whispered into his ear before gently pushing him back. She went right home, not bothering to look back. If anyone asked she’ll just say she forgot she had to put dinner on.

–

Finn watched as she walked away never looking back, she was so hard to figure out all the time, he never knew what to expect when it came to Rae Earl. He buttoned and zipped up his fly before he pulled out his tin to light up a smoke but cursed realizing he had to roll one. He shoved the tin back in his pocket and took off his plaid flannel wrapping it around his waist to cover the small wet spot by his fly. He ambled back into the pub spotting Izzy and Chop in their own little world, Chloe was at the bar chatting to some bloke he sort of recognized; he wouldn’t be missed. So he headed to the toilet to clean up then would call it a night and head home.

–

The next day, Saturday, Rae was off work and miraculously her mum and stepdad went away for the weekend so she would be by herself. She could have told Finn this when she invited him over and they likely could have just had a sex filled weekend, but she didn’t like him to stay in her space any longer than he had to. Even though she’s been fucking him for the past few months on a regular basis, she didn’t want to bring him into her world, they weren’t really friends, she didn’t want him knowing any more than he had to about her.

She spent most of the day lounging about and cleaning up her room. He hadn’t been over in a while and she didn’t need him to see something that would start something that would result in nothing but bickering. So hiding anything that needed to be hidden was her goal, her diary, her copy of Backstreet Boys Chloe bought her as a gag gift, a few of her erotic novels. Anything that would give him reason to start something with her. Sometimes it was like he wound her up on purpose, but then she does the same at times. In the end though they can never go long without being with one another. When she ignored him for three days it was rough, she’s used to seeing him, even if they’re not doing anything. But she needed to stand her ground and let him come crawling back to her. She wasn’t even sure if he would as she hadn’t seen him during that time. And thinking about it she would not be one bit surprised if whatever was going on with them ended with that one act. In fact, she knows it’s very possible that this could be over at anytime, that she or he could end it at any time. But thinking about it, he would be the one to end it before her, he had options, what did she really have? She didn’t want to make it out to be more than anything it was, it was just fucking, friends with benefits would be a stretch as they weren’t necessarily friends but for the sake of labels that’s what she would call it. But when and where would it end?

When she glanced at the clock it was just about to tick 5, so she went downstairs to get some water and wait the arrival of her guest. As she set the empty glass down the front door opened then closed. On time, as always.

“Rae!” he called, something different in his tone of voice.

“Kitchen.”

“Do you have a plaster?”

She furrowed her eyebrows, “Yeah, hold on.” She exited the kitchen one way as he entered the other. She went upstairs to the bathroom and pulled out the box. Coming back down stairs she went into the kitchen he was sat at the table, she walked over to him and put the box down in front of him. He looked up at her and “Oh shit.” Was the first thing to escape her mouth. She grabbed some paper towel and ran it under the tap, then proceeded to dab gently at the cut above his eyebrow.

“Got it during footie earlier, thought it stopped but me helmet must have opened it.” He mumbled. She patted it until it began to let up then opened the plaster putting it on his cut.

“Thanks.” He looked up at her and she smiled genuinely down at him.

Glancing down he noticed something different about her. He looked back up at her and held her gaze as he reached out his hand. He slid it up the inside of her leg until he was gently squeezing the plump flesh of her inner thigh.

“No leggin’s?” he smirked.

“I’m running out of them because of you.” She chuckled slightly.

He gently squeezed her flesh then slowly glided his hand further up, he ghosted his hand over her panties; she parted her legs slightly allowing him to cup her fully. She’s so warm, he thought, and he massaged her gently.

She let out a breathy sigh, “Not in the kitchen.”

He removed his hand and stood, he took her hand in his and led her to her bedroom. Is was quiet, like it normally is but it was a different sort of quiet. Both realizing it was the nicest they’d ever been to each other. But once they were in her room the sexual tension was thick and then they were all over each other.

She laid back on the bed breathing heavily after they undressed, Finn hovering over her, kissing her lips then down her neck. Sucking and nipping her breasts, while his right middle and index fingers rub tight circles against her clit, her fingers tugging at his hair. He trailed his mouth down until he was tasting her, her moans filled the air as he sucked on her clit. He slipped two fingers inside of her massaging her slowly, a sensational burning in her belly, toes curled she freezes a moment and comes releasing her held breath as he still licks her. She gently pushes him away because she can’t take much more, he comes up with half lidded eyes and his mouth open as he is slightly out of breath. He wipes of his mouth and moves back between her legs, he’s sitting on his knees and she hands him a condom.

He opens it, tosses the wrapper aside and rolls it down his length. Looking at her she nods and he pushes into her, she rolls her head back as usual and is gripping the duvet. He puts his hands on the bed, by either side of her head and begins to thrust.

–

She’s lying on top of him now, panting into his chest. He likes when she’s on top she’s gathered. He never out right says it but he encourages her to do it. The first time she didn’t like it, too afraid she would hear something crack so she told him she wanted it from behind, which he happily obliged. But other times, like when it was on a sofa, which was often, he’d pull her on top of him. Gradually she became more comfortable with it.

Gaining her breath back she un-straddled him and lay next to him, her body feeling hot and sweaty. She looked at the clock and it was nearing ten, they had been at it for a long time. When a time was available and it wasn’t a quick fumble, they often would be at if for hours not only because they had the time, but they’re horny teenagers so they are going to try whatever position they can get in to.

He swiftly got up and started to get dressed, she pulled the duvet over her. Usually this was the awkward part, trying not to make eye contact, remembering they don’t like each other. When he was done she was sitting up and he turned to her, he opened his mouth like he was going to say something but he didn’t. “Laters.” She said and smiled thinly. He nodded, and left.

She waited until she heard the door shut before getting up. A shower was needed for sure, she picked up all the condom wrappers they had discarded and made sure to dispose of them discreetly.

–

Getting home Finn put his helmet on the coffee table, then went to the kitchen for some water. Gulping it back quickly he then set the empty glass down by the sink. He felt a tickle under his eyebrow suddenly, and he moved his fingers over the space realizing the plaster Rae had stuck on him earlier was now barely hanging on. Peeling it off he inspected it, there was a small patch of blood. He set it down on the counter top before making his way to his room. He stripped off his clothes and got into bed wearing only his boxers.

He looked over at the empty bed space next him, he normally slept in the center of the bed but for the past few months he’s been sleeping on the right side. He pulled the duvet back untucking it from the other side and scooched over to the middle of his bed. After laying a moment, arranging and rearranging his pillows he found he wasn’t comfortable and moved back to the right side of the bed. He turned over facing the left side, the curtain over the window open a few inches allowing some moonlight to shine through, “let some light in here.” Rae’s voice rang through his head. He grabbed the unoccupied pillow and hugged it to him as his eyes grew heavy.

–

The week went as usual, work, pub, friends, Finn. They weren’t always in the same place at the same time, but more often than not he would show up for a quick fumble at her work, or she would meet him at his flat during his lunch hour.

On Wednesday they were at the pub. She was already there with Izzy and Chloe, Izzy still trying to get her dad to let her go camping. Linda agreeing almost immediately, Rae cringed not wanting to know why her mum agreed so fast, like did they want to risk another kid? Two should be enough.

They were sipping their drinks thinking of ways to help Izzy convince her dad when they heard Chops voice. Izzy perking up immediately. 

“Hey, there they are.” Chop grinned as he walked over to them. Finn, and Archie in tow. She was alright with Archie, when he was in school they chatted a bit in the library where both confessed to hiding out wanting to stay under the radar.

Chop pulled a chair from a neighboring table sitting next to Izzy. “What are you girls up to?” he looked between them. As Finn and Archie grabbed some neighboring chairs to join them.

“Just havin’ a drink.” Izzy smiled sweetly.

“Did you find out if you could go?”

Rae sighed internally, he looked so hopeful, poor Chop. “Not yet.” Izzy grimaced. “But I’ll think of somethin’. There’s still a lot of time.” She smiled sadly.

Chop nodded solemnly, “Right, I need a drink. Lads?” Finn and Archie nodded.

“Hi, Rae. A’right? Haven’t seen you about since I’ve been back.” Archie commented.

“Oh, I’ve been about, workin’ at Town.” She smiled.

“Really, I’ll have to come see ya, you did used to bang on ‘bout music quite a bit.”

“Yeah, I still do.” She chuckled. “Anyway, how’s uni life treatin’ you? Any love interests? Or just hittin’ the books?” she wasn’t sure if he had come out yet, so she didn’t want to say anything out of order. When he told her he seemed petrified at the thought of coming out. He had confessed his secret to her on one of their many run in’s, he seemed down and looked somewhat distraught. She sat putting a hand to his shoulder and he suddenly asked to kiss her. It stunned her at first, she was confused on why he wanted to kiss her he didn’t ever seem interested in her in that sort of way before, then she saw how sad he was. He apologized immediately, then after moments of silence he confessed to her that he had kissed both boys and girls before but felt nothing, that he started to think he had no sexuality. She calmed him rubbing his shoulder gently and explained that it might not be as simple as just kissing someone that perhaps there has to be some sort of deeper connection to the person to feel anything, and maybe that’s why the kisses felt so empty.

“It’s all so fascinating, uni life, I think I’ve adapted quite well, and my flat mate is a bit interesting but we are able to coexist.” He laughed lightly. “What are your plans now that you’re done with college? Is uni on the horizon?”

“Oh, no, decided to take a gap year. I don’t even know what I want to do, so it’s seemed like the best option.”

“I thought you wanted to do something with music, or was it writing? You banged on about both.” Archie stated with a grin.

“Yeah, well—“

“This music’s doing me head in, Archie put somethin’ decent on the jukebox will ya.” Finn cut in sliding twenty pence across the table. 

Rae looked at him a little annoyed, then said, “I’ll do it.” grabbing the twenty pence with smirk.

“No, I want Archie to do it. He knows his music.” Finn responded with a wink to Archie.

She resisted the urge to roll her eyes, “I know my music.” She retorted. “And if you don’t like what I put on, I’ll give you this 20p back.”

Her chair scraped as she roughly pushed it back, “I’ll help, Rae. I’m sure between the both of us we can pick something Finn will approve of.” Archie smiled and followed her to the jukebox.

“So, I see you and Finn still do not get along.” He grimaced.

“Did we ever?” She scoffed.

“Well, I suppose not, you never really had a reason to be around each other until, well, Chop has told me about Izzy, has anything happened there?”

“No, not yet, it’s weird, it’s like we know they like each other, but they’ve somehow friend zoned each other.”

“My sentiments, exactly.” Archie agreed.

“So..” Rae began looking up from the jukebox, “Speaking of liking people, tell me for real, is there anyone?”

Archie’s face turned a bit red and he looked away but she caught his smile, “Ah, so spill.” She said nudging him slightly.

“He’s in one of my classes, we’ve only been on a few dates, but..” he trailed off.

“Oh, you totally did it. You slag!” she hissed teasingly at him.

“He’s nice. We have a lot in common.” Archie shrugged.

“I’m happy for you.” She smiled.

“What about you, Rae? Any lucky blokes snap you up?”

“Ha, no.” she shook her head.

She picked an old song but nothing else really caught her eye, “Spin on this, Finn.” She said aloud causing Archie to laugh as Sabotage boomed throughout the pub.

“He can be quite a music snob.” Archie laughed.

“Yeah, but so can I.” She commented as they walked back to the table.

“Not bad…for mainstream.” Finn spoke before sipping his pint.

Rae rolled her eyes and finished the last half of her pint in one gulp, while ignoring Finn’s stare.

–

As the night went on so did the drinks, she was feeling happy and laughing at all the lame jokes Chop was making in an effort to get Izzy to laugh. She had no idea why the two just didn’t get together already instead of this long drawn out game they were in.

Her knee was bumped and she looked down to see it was Finn, she looked up at him and he mouthed something to her but she didn’t catch it. He must have saw her confusion because the next thing she knew he was tracing along her jean covered thigh. She didn’t get it the first time but the second time she did, “G-O?” she looked around at the gang and Izzy and Chop were lost in their own little world and she had no idea what Chloe and Archie were bangin’ on about and she also had no idea how Finn ended up next to her. Maybe it was when Archie went to get the last round and Finn was just back from putting something on the jukebox.

In the end she nodded. He left first, she waited a good ten minutes before giving her excuses to leave, the others not really seeming to pay much mind to it. When she walked out she headed towards Finns, but was stopped when he stepped in front of her.

“I thought you’d be at yours.” She said in surprise.

“Nah, I figure we could go to yours, I didn’t have that many drinks because I drove meeting the lads here.” He said nodding back towards his car. “Your mum and Karim are still on nights, right? Sister at the neighbors?”

“Wha—how do you…?” she stammered.

He shrugged, “Yours?”

“Yeah.” She nodded.

She wasn’t that drunk, not even a little probably, but she still can’t remember ever telling Finn that information. The ride to hers was quiet, and the walk up to her room was quieter, but that’s where it ended. Loud moans and ragged breaths filled the next hour.

–

The days and the nights following at the pub were different, the tense atmosphere that usually surrounded her and Finn started to uncoil. There wasn’t as many sharp jabs, or drawn out arguments, there was still the small scoffs and the mumbled, ‘pricks’ and ‘whatever’s’ but nothing quite like it used to be. It was strange but oddly not at the same time. When she was at work there wasn’t ever much time to talk so it was interesting how things slightly shifted.

“Mmm.” Rae moaned as Finn drug his lips down her neck, her legs tightening around him, her fist bunching up the back of shirt as he sucked the sensitive skin just above her collar bone. He had come into the shop and as he passed the counter their eyes connected, and he headed towards the back. She waited a moment before leaving Rob to the handle the few customers in the shop. She went to the store room and he followed her in.

He shut the door and wasted no time kissing her, he lifted her up and sat her on the desk. She carder her fingers through the hair at the nape of his neck tugging slightly when he hit a sweet spot. Kissing his lips again she slid her right hand down the front of his chest and over the thick of his jeans. She brushed her hand against him softly eliciting a deep moan from him. She quickened her pace teasing him. But the voices just outside the door made them pause. She sighed as Finn touched his forehead to hers.

“To be continued?” he asked.

“To be continued.” She replied.

He nodded and adjusted himself, “I’ll go out first.” She said.

Opening the door a bit she saw Rob talking to Archie, she turned to look at Finn, “Archie.” She whispered.

His face contorted in confusion and he put his hands up asking a silent, “What is he doing here?”

“I’ll get rid of him.” She whispered.

He nodded silently, she opened the door enough for her to slip out. She shut the door behind her and cleared her throat.

“Hiya, Archie, what are you doing here?” she smiled.

“I told you I would come by…it was just sooner rather than later.”

“Right, well, um, this is Rob, my boss.” She pointed to him.

“Yeah, we met.” Archie grinned.

“Oh great, well, you looking for anything in particular?”

“Mm, not sure. What can you show me?” he asked.

“Well, let’s see shall we. Rob, wanna lend us a hand and play somethin’ decent.” She smiled cheekily.

“Sure thing, Rae.” He laughed.

She led Archie away from the back, Rob went to the front and when she looked back she saw Finn sneaking out, no one any wiser. 

–

It had been two days since he had been intimate with Rae. There wasn’t much time for them to have a quick encounter. He started something with her at her work before they had to stop and now he was aching to finish. He’d seen her of course, talked a little, and there were nowhere near as many eye rolls or scoffs he’s become accustom to, which was new, he hadn’t noticed it before, until it was missing. It was interesting to say the least because that means he must be doing something different too. He figured that maybe tonight might be the night something could happen. He pulled the pre-rolled cigarette he had tucked behind his ear to his lips and brought his lighter up to the tip. As he rounded the corner he bumped into someone the unlit cigarette dropping onto the pavement.

“Fuck.” He muttered before looking up to see who caused this.

“Come on Nelson.” He his head snapped up to see Rae.

“What?” he asked in a bit of shock.

“Come on.” She urged and walked passed him.

He had no reason not to follow her so he abandoned his cigarette and jogged a few steps to catch up with her.

“What happened? Where are we going?” He asked as he walked in sync with her. Her long legs keeping a firm, determined pace. “I thought we were meeting the others at the pub?”

He heard her sigh and then he was being pulled into a side alley and pressed up against the wall of a shop as her lips attacked his. He groaned low in his throat his hands immediately grabbing at her hips to press her to him. His tongue snuck into her mouth and his right hand went to the back of her head to tangle in her hair. He tilted her head to get a deeper angle and it sounded as if she purred, it caused his eyes to pop open for a second before scrunching back shut. When they pulled away they both took in a gulp of air. He really couldn’t help but laugh a little.

“Well, if that’s what you wanted you should have just said.” He smirked. It really wouldn’t have been Rae if she didn’t roll her eyes, which she did and he laughed.

“Mine, I take it?” he asked.

“Yeah.” She nodded. He pushed off the wall and grabbed her hand dragging her back out into the street where they started walking towards his, but a few paces in she pulled her hand away. He furrowed his brows and looked at her out of the corner of his eye but didn’t say anything.

They were quiet the rest of the walk, but upon entering his flat she slammed her lips to his and was pushing is flannel off his shoulders. He wasted no time and slid his hands up her shirt around to her bra unsnapping it. They separated long enough for them to pull their tops off. Finn took the opportunity to unbutton his jeans, Rae shimmying out of her jeans as well. Walking her back to the settee both only in their underwear. He sat on the settee and as she stood in front of him he reached out hooking his thumb in the band of her panties to pull them down, she stepped out of them and straddled him. She kissed his lips softly and rubbed herself against him. He pulled away groaning and taking a breath as she kissed down his neck. He moved his right hand from her waist down to glide his fingers across her wetness. She moaned as she nibbled on his neck biting with a little more oomph. He brought her to orgasm, her short breaths hot and wet on his neck. She hummed in satisfaction and then stood. Looking up at her, her eyes heavy and dazed he lifted his bum and slid off his boxers. She began to lower herself to straddle him but he stopped her with a hand on her hip.

“Turn around.” She cocked her head to the side. “Trust me.” He said softly.

With a curious look she turned, her round bottom on display in front of him, he bit his lip and traced lightly over the two dimples at the bottom of her back before leaning forward kissing the bottom of her spine, then pulled he her to sit on his lap.

“I don’t know if this is gonna work.” She spoke softly as he kissed the side of her neck.

“Lift up a little.” He said as he continued to kiss her.

She sighed but did, he slid down the sofa a little, and she opened her legs wider so they hung over top of his, reaching down she guided him into her. She moaned and her head rolled back to rest on his shoulder. His left hand gripping her breast as the right rested on her stomach. He slowly thrusts, and her left hand comes to rest on top his right as they move. It’s slow but then she is swiveling her hips and moaning his name as he grunts into her neck. His hands clench and her soft skin is bulging through his fingers as he holds on tight to her. She whimpers as she nears and so he guides his left hand down until his fingers are playing with her clit, she jolts and cries out loudly coming instantly, the clenching around his dick has him coming and stuttering out her name. She’s breathing heavily but turns to look at him a moment before leaning in and capturing his lips with hers. His fingers are still moving on her clit until she’s pushing them away and then lifts up and slides him out of her. Their lips still connected as he guides her to lay back on the sofa.

—

Rae walked back to the front of the store when she was sure Finn was gone. She picked up an album someone didn’t put back and made her way to re-shelve it. Turning around she found Rob staring at her with an amused grin. She furrowed her eyebrows, “What?” she asked pointedly.

“Nothin’” he said as he shook his head with a crooked smile. He took a few steps towards her and held out two cd’s in his hand for her to take.

Taking them from him he still held on to them, “It’s sort of obvious you know. You and Finn.” He whispered, he let go of his hold on the cd’s and in shock she released her hold on them, and they went crashing on the floor.

Rob immediately bent down picking them up, there was no one else about the store, and as Rae processed what he said she cleared her throat and said, “I don’t know what you are talking about.”

When he stood he smiled knowingly, “Pretty sure no one else is any wiser, but it wasn’t that hard to put the pieces together.” He shrugged one shoulder.

“How?” she asked, figuring there was no point in lying.

“Well, for one, when he comes in you both seem to just…disappear…aaaand also I heard you guys one time, when I was changing out the music.” He said as if it was no big deal, “I’m not judgin’. With you both workin’, him at the garage and you here, well, I guess you need to find time to get your jollies. And I take it you don’t want anyone else knowin’.” 

“I didn’t mean for it to happen….” She blurted then clamped her hand over her mouth to prevent her from revealing anything else.

He sighed with a smile, “That’s the thing Rae, we do lots of things we don’t mean, but if we keep doin’ ‘em, it must mean somethin’.”

Smiling softly he left her and headed to the till. She stood a moment, contemplating what he said, she meant that she didn’t mean for it to happen in the shop, but his words felt like they had a deeper meaning. After a moment she ambled over to put the cds away in their correct spot. Tucking them away she let out a tired breath, then a hand was on her lower back and it made her jump, like it was a foreign touch.

“Alright, Rae? Sorry I scared ya.”

Rae let out a breathy chuckle, “No, its alright, Izzy. Just in my head. What’s up?”

“I didn’t get to tell ya but guess what?” she smiled brightly showing all her teeth, bouncing on her the tips of her toes.

“What?” she smiled at her smitten friend.

“Chop kissed me…well on the cheek. But it’s more than he’s ever done.”

Rae laughed lightly at her friend, “I’m happy for you.”

“Do you think it means something more? Chloe said friends kiss each other on the cheek all the time?” she rushed worrying her bottom lip now looking up at Rae.

“Izzy, he likes you, don’t over think what Chloe says. Now tell me exactly what happened, while I organize this mess of a shop.” She smiled bumping Izzy with her hip making her laugh

–

The next evening when she got to the pub Archie was there first, she slid in the booth sitting across from him.

“Hey, Rae”

“Hiya.” She smiled.

“You’re here early.” He shrugged, “So what’s up?”

“Nothin’.”

“Come on out with it.”

“It’s just—I dunno, I mean, I love Uni, but coming home for the summer made me realize how much I miss home, and all my friends here.” He leant his elbow on the table resting his chin on his palm. “Maybe, I shouldn’t have picked a Uni that was so far away.”

“Arch, I think it’s going to take a little time to get used to, I’m sure next summer you won’t even want to come home.” She smiled.

“Yeah, I’ve heard that. It’s just funny, I couldn’t wait to get out, to be..well..me. And now the town that I felt was holding me back..I’m missing.”

“It’s your home you’re always gonna miss it, not everything was bad here, you had Finn and Chop.”

“True.” He nodded.

“By the way Archie, are you..um…out…here, I mean..to anyone?” She asked curiously.

“Just to my parents and Finn.” He replied. “Well, Finn knew.”

“He knew? Just like that?” she wondered.

Archie nodded, “Yeah, when I asked him how he knew and why he didn’t say anything he just said, ‘you’re my best mate, and it’s your business’ seems I was worried for nothing.”

She’s not sure what sound she made but it prompted Archie to add, “He really is a good person, just can easily be a grumpy sod.”

All she could do was hum in reply, as she didn’t have an exact response for him, “You know, Rae when your gap year is over you can enroll at my Uni.” He smiled.

“Oh don’t even start.” She smiled rolling her eyes.

“Hey, Finn.” Archie greeted him as he walked up. He nodded and sat next to her with a good amount of space between them.

“Alright, Arch, May?” he asked. Not looking up as he was pulling out his tin.

“Yeah, just trying to convince Rae here to go to uni with me when her gap year is over.”

This seemed to catch his attention as he looked up at Archie and then to her for a quick second, “I promise you will love it, Rae. And you would know someone there.”

“Good selling point Archie.” She laughed. “I don’t know yet.” She shrugged, “I just got out of school and wanna enjoy what’s left of summer, before thinking about school again.”

“I’m going to make you a list of all the reasons why you should.” He grinned.

“Should what?” Chop asked walking up, Izzy and Chloe following behind.

“Why Rae should go to uni with me.”

“Oh yeah? Well, the parties I heard—“

“I thought we were supposed to discuss camping.” Finn chimed in interrupting.

“Right you are Finny my boy” Chop said patting him on the shoulder, he expressed the need to get a round in before the discussion commenced.

If Rae was honest she was not at all cut out for camping. And those who were deserved a medal or an award of some sort. To willingly go out into the wild and be one with nature or whatever the fuck you’re supposed to do was not appealing to her at all. And sitting listening to Chop talk on and on about it had her shamefully hoping Izzy wasn’t allowed to go. Bugs flying about and sweaty tents did not sound like fun to her.

“So there’s going to be ten of us in total.” Chop grinned, “Make sure to bring your own tent if you don’t want to share.”

Rae thought for a moment, she’s pretty sure her mum still has Uncle Mark’s tent in the loft. She could use that, she might need to air it out some first though, she winced realizing how much she was planning for something she didn’t really want to do. 

“Who is all is going?” Archie asked.

“Us, here, Me, you, Finn, Iz, if she can and Raemundo, and also—“

Rae missed the other names Chop listed off as she became distracted by her knee being bumped. She didn’t mean to look so sharply at Finn but he hit her knee with some oomph, looking at him he furrowed his eyebrows and shrugged his shoulders as if to say “what?” she shook her head thinking it must have been an accident and he wasn’t trying to get her attention. So she let it go and when she turned back into the conversation Chop was asking Chloe if she was sure about not going. She was very adamant on declining the invitation.

“We need to make a list of other things we’ll need as well.” Chop said, “But first another round is in order. Come on Arch.” Chop slapped Archie on the shoulder as he stood. The two made their way to the bar and Izzy and Chloe were whispering to each other, Rae hoped it wasn’t anything that would make Izzy worry later, but the way her cheeks reddened had Rae thinking it was something else they were discussing, and then Izzy was excusing herself to the toilets Chloe sliding out of the booth following behind her.

“Hey.” Finn said softly.

“Yeah.” She replied not looking at him, he was messing about rolling a cigarette and she was fiddling with a beer mat.

“Wanna skip out early? Got something to show ya’s.”

She thought for a moment, It would definitely be better than enduring the pain of more camping stories and also would lessen the risk of her being pulled into some sort of sexual experience conversation she would likely be brought into by Chloe. She couldn’t exactly participate in that, because mum’s the word when it came to her and anything related to sex.

“Sure.” She shrugged.

“Like an hour?” he asked.

“What time is it?”

“Half past seven.” He said looking at his watch.

Rae looked over to the bar, Chop was explaining something animatedly with his hands, Archie looked pained and when she looked at the bathroom Chloe and Izzy were exiting, Chloe was smiling a bit proudly and Izzy looked stricken, “If not sooner.” Rae mumbled quickly before they reached the table.

“I think this a record.” Chloe said as she plonked down.

Rae raised her eyebrow unsure of what she was talking about, “You two haven’t said a cross thing to each other all night.”

She felt more than saw Finn’s shrug, so she mimicked it, but then he mumbled, “The night is young.” Just as Chop cheerfully said “Drink up.” Plonking the drinks down. She couldn’t help but smile, and she chanced a glance over at Finn catching a glimpse of him smiling.

Forty minutes later she was so over listening to Chop ramble on about his camping experiences, she thought he’d better be quiet if there was any hope of Izzy actually going even if she got permission, she looked positively mortified as he went on about a snake slithering into his tent. Archie looking pretty pale as well.

She knocked her knee against Finns and said, “Well, as much fun as this has been I need to get going.” And to her surprise no one protested, she figured they were too horrified by Chops ‘stories’ to realize.

Heading out of the pub she made her way towards Finn’s flat. She really really wasn’t prepared to go camping but would push through it for Izzy. And also wanted to slap Chop upside the head if he didn’t make some sort of move, this weird dance they were doing was getting old. She soon heard hard footsteps behind her, she turned to see it was Finn walking to catch up to her. As he reached her he said he left Chop telling them about the time he saw a bear, Finn rolled his eyes and she laughed.

–

“So are you really going camping next week?” Finn asked as he opened the door to his flat.

“I’m not sure yet.” Rae shrugged, if Izzy couldn’t go she wasn’t about to try and survive in the wild for no reason. She knew it wasn’t really the wild, more like a patch of field, but still sleeping outdoors wasn’t on her list of things she wanted to do. 

“Oh, but don’t you need to like know ahead of time so you can take off work?” he asked as they passed through his front door.

“Rob’s pretty cool about things.” She said setting her bag down.

“That’s good, so how long have you been at Town now?”

“Um, since, March, just before school was over.”

“Did you know you wanted to take a gap year? Is that why you got the job at Town?”

He was sat on the settee now and she was giving him a confusing look, “What?” he asked.

“Nothing, just..” she trailed off and sat next to him.

“So..” he sighed.

“So..” she mimicked him.

She put her hand on his thigh and began rubbing it lightly, blood rushing to his cock already, leaning over she kissed him and he couldn’t help but turn his body towards her. She held onto his shirt tightly until he was pulling her to sit on his lap. Straddling him she pulled her mouth away from his and took her shirt off, as that layer hit the floor he was rolling up her vest top, she pulled it off and flung it across the room. She helped him pull his shirt off then went back to kissing him. He unsnapped her bra and she slid it down her arms tossing it to the side while he slid his hand under her skirt and grumbled through the kiss because of her leggings. She stood and pulled her skirt and leggings down but before she could pull down her panties he pulled her to him. Settled, she rubbed herself against him while kissing his neck.

She soon slid off him and onto her knees to help him get his jeans and boxers off, “So what ARE you going to do when your gap year is over?” he asked as he lifted his bum to help her.

“You wanna talk about this, now, really?” she said pulling his jeans down his legs and putting them to side.

“It’s just a question, Rae.” He scoffed at her.

“Okay, well, here is one for you, do you want me to answer them or…” she grabbed his cock in her hand and began stroking him, “or put this guy in my mouth.”

He had absolutely no idea where the sound he made came from, it was a mix between a whimper and a groan but it apparently answered her question because his hands were tangled in her hair as she sucked his cock. He tried his best not to thrust but he couldn’t help it, when she came off she was breathy and she licked her lips while looking at him, her right hand stroking him. “Good answer.” She replied.

Standing she was hooking her thumb in the band of her panties but he quickly stood and grabbed her hand, “Bedroom.”

Walking in he flipped on the light, she spied a gift bag in the corner it was black with red tissue paper sticking out. “Is that what you want to show me?” she asked.

“Yeah, but in a little bit.” He smirked. “Now lay down.”

He kissed her and guided her to lay down with a hand on her lower back, making sure she was in the middle of the bed. He then moved his kisses down to her jaw, her neck, across her chest, until he was sucking and nipping her nipples. He moved off of her to lay on his left side and continued to suck on her right breast. His hand trailed down her stomach and he rubbed over her damp panties. “So wet.” He mumbled hotly.

He slid his hand underneath the flimsy material feeling how warm and wet she was, he moved his fingers around spreading her wetness all over her lips and pubic mound, “You’re always soaking after sucking me cock, I think you like it.” He murmured as he began to rub her clit. She hummed in response in what sounded like an agreement.

Slipping two fingers inside of her she moaned, and her eyes closed. Her breaths becoming short and she could feel a burning in her belly but it wouldn’t be Finn if he didn’t remove his fingers, which he did. He trailed his wet fingers up her body until he was touching them to her lips. He traced her lips with his tongue before kissing her. When he pulled away, he asked, “Do you trust me?”

She turned her head to him, “Why?”

“Just do you?” he asked again, softly.

Staring at him, his eyes were soft, and almost no brown was showing they were so black. His lips were wet and his cheeks pink, they didn’t really get along but he’s never done anything to hurt her, never gave any indication that there was a reason not to trust him, she wouldn’t have been sleeping with him this long if she hadn’t on some level trusted him.

“Yes.”

A slow smile spread across his face then he kissed her, it was tender and tingly; he then got off the bed and grabbed the gift bag.

He set it next to her and sat beside her as she stay laying. “What’s in the bag?” she asked curiously.

“It’s all for your pleasure m’dear.” He smirked. Rummaging through the bag, he paused and looked up at her, “Put your hands above your head and hold onto the posts you’re most comfortable with.” 

She did as he said and grabbed a post with each hand leaving one in between. He smiled and pulled out what looked like hand cuffs but they were soft and fluffy looking, he leaned over her and placed one on her right wrist then threaded it around the empty post to her left wrist securing them, “Alright?” he asked.

She nodded pressing her thighs together in anticipation for what else was to come. The next thing he pulled out was blind fold, he showed it to her and he saw a flash of panic in her eyes, “Is this okay?” he asked softly. She gulped, and nodded.

Lifting her head up he slid it over her adjusting it until she was comfortable, “Does it feel alright, nothing too tight?” he asked.

“No.” she spoke, her voice thick.

“Okay.” He said, his voice gentle.

She felt the bed move wondering what he would do.

He was on all fours hovering over her, looking at her perfect form. He didn’t know what he wanted to do first. He settled for running his thumb over her parted plump lips, then traced the outline of her lips with his index finger before gliding it down her chin to her neck, between her breasts to down to her belly button.

“I’ve been thinking about this for weeks.” He murmured.

She squirmed a bit, her stomach clenching with the sensation and the not knowing what he was going to do next. Now he was licking a path from just above her belly button to between her breasts. She moaned and tugged lightly on the restraints. He sloppily kissed his way back down her body until he was licking across the skin just above her panties. She moaned involuntarily biting her lower lip wondering if he was going to go down or use his fingers. Though her eyes were covered she still was scrunching them closed in anticipation.

The strip where he licked felt cool as the air hit her, feeling him shift again she thinks he’s hovering over her, she released the hold she had on her bottom lip and let out a breath. “You love biting your lower lip.” he whispered, his voice thick with desire.

He kissed her it was soft but soon turned heated, he sucked on her lips and then he was biting her lower lip tugging it between his teeth. She couldn’t help but pull on her restraints wanting desperately to get her hands anywhere on him. He moved kissing down her neck and then her breasts, he pushed them together and smothered his face in them. It was something he had always wanted to do and now he was, he was rock hard and wanted her badly but he wasn’t done yet.

She moaned and cried out his name as he licked her tits, sucking on her nipples, he moved back up to her face and sucked on the side of her neck a moment, then his breath was warm on her ear as he whispered, “Still trust me?”

“Yes.” She replied breathily, desperately trying to rub her legs together.

There was a whoosh of air and she didn’t feel him by her anymore, she panicked for a second until she heard him fumbling with something, like he was opening something in plastic, he cursed a bit and she couldn’t help but smile to herself.

Finn looked down at Rae her legs were now bent at the knees, thighs firmly pressed together, and she was wriggling around a bit and biting her lower lip. When he had her surprise ready he hovered back over her, “Still teasing that bottom lip I see.” She released it and he kissed her roughly just for a second, she strained her neck wanting more but he had pulled too far away.

She heard a very faint buzzing sound and couldn’t place it. He pushed her legs open and cupped her and began to slowly massage his hand over her damp panties, “Bite your bottom lip.” he requested. She did immediately.

He removed his hand and watched as she worried her bottom in anticipation, he smiled to himself then pressed the mini vibrator to her cunt.

She gasped her head popping up from the pillow, a loud moan followed causing her to wiggle around, the vibrations sending shockwaves of pleasure throughout her entire body. He moved the vibrator and traced two fingers over her covered slit, before pressing it to her again.

“Fuck…me.” Rae said, breathless, her back arching off the bed, she hummed in pleasure, her breaths short as she fell back.

“You like that?” he asked as he teased her.

“Yes.” She hissed, tugging on the restraints.

He pressed the vibrator to her clit with a little more pressure, she sucked her lips moaning in the pleasure she was feeling, it was like nothing she’d ever felt before, her cunt was pulsating in want.

When he removed the vibrator he noticed her neck and chest flushed a lovely shade of pink, her breast rising and falling rapidly with her short breaths. He laid his hand over her drenched panties and she flinched with sensitivity.

His hand lay still and she was impatiently wanting him to touch her, move his hand, anything that would satiate the need she had. She tugged on the restraints as she shifted her pelvis up, “Want these off?” he asked as he pulled on the band of her panties and let it snap back.

“You know I do.” She hummed, she felt like there was lump in her throat from barely speaking.

“Okay…” he began, he rubbed over her and she moaned, her head pressing further into the pillow, he smirked to himself as he watched her writhe in desire, he turned the vibrator up two tics then lifted the band of her panties, he made like he was going to roll them down, he could tell she was ready to lift up to assist, but there was no need, he wasn’t taking them off quite yet.

He parted her lips, causing her pelvis to dip down slightly like a flinch, he pressed the mini vibrator to her clit and she moaned loudly. He removed his fingers allowing her lips to envelope the vibrator holding it in place.

Her breathing was becoming shallow and she tried to close her legs together for friction but he held them in place. “Let’s leave that there for a bit.” He whispered.

After rolling her panties back up, he moved back on all fours hovering over her, watching her face contort in frustration as she tried to get herself off. He smiled and watched as she hummed in pleasure, as she bit and released her plump bottom lip when she took a gulp of air. He snuck his hand down applying the lightest pressure, she gasped, “Finn!” whining she tugged on the restraints.

“Finn, please.” She cried, her voice raspy, body bucking, until she paused straining to sit up and let out a strangled cry as she came. He kissed her as soon as she fell back. Her body trembling. Pulling away she sucked in a gulp of air.

He moved down to remove the vibrator. As he tended to that, Rae wondered if this is where it ended, she didn’t know if she had the strength to continue, she felt like jello, her body at peace and relaxed.

Finn set the vibrator down on its packaging to be cleaned later. Looking back at Rae her breathing was evening out, her chest and neck now stained a rosy red. He moved to sit next to her and slipped the blindfold up, she blinked her eyes adjusting to the dim light in his room, “Alright?” he asked.

She nodded and took a swallow, “Yeah.”

Smiling softly he then leaned down and kissed her. It was so gentle it caused a shiver throughout her entire body. Pulling back he smiled, then reached over for the key to the handcuffs, she had missed him laying them on the bedside table on her side. Freeing her hands she sat up as he put them on the bed side table while she rubbed her wrist, “They alright?” he asked as he took over for her.

“Yeah, just all the pulling I did on them.” She chuckled lightly causing him to snort a small laugh. Her wrists were a faint pink but they felt tired more than pain. She looked down at him slowly rubbing his thumbs over the inner of her wrists, then back at him. He was so soft and gentle when he wanted to be. Before all this started she had only ever saw the roughness of him, the sharp too cool attitude. She was beginning to think it was just some sort of front, he was never callous when they were alone, always attentive to her every need, he sometimes got his wording wrong, but it would barely compare to the shit she’s heard from other people.

She couldn’t help but swoop her head under and kiss him. He released her wrists a little surprised, his hands going to cup her face. She pushed herself into him, one hand on his bicep the other wrapping around the base of his cock. He moaned into her mouth as she began to stroke him. She pushed him back until he was lying down. She removed her hand from his cock and positioned herself to straddle him. She still had her panties on so she made to move them to the side, but he stopped her with a gentle hand on her wrist. They locked eyes and he smiled devilishly. He tugged at the band of her panties and then she was gasping as he ripped them, she could barely react to him ripping the other side. He pulled them off of her and flung them across the room her eyes following their path until she finally looked back at him in surprise.

“Holy fuck.” She laughed.

He stifled a laugh, his mouth pulling up into as lopsided smile, he shifted up and she shook her head in amusement. She rubbed herself against his cock, teasing him as he slipped between her wet folds. His hands were on her tits pulling and squeezing her nipples. Until finally she sat up enough to grip him and guide him inside of her. His hands went to her hips as she began to slide up and down. His hands slid farther up the curves of her body until they were cupping her breasts again, he needed to taste them so he made to sit up but she wrapped her hands around his wrists and pushed him to lie back down, her pressing his arms down into the mattress above his head as she rode him.

“You gonna tie me up, girl?” he smirked at her.

She ground down on him harder causing him to groan, he knew he could overpower her but he loved watching her on top. “Not tonight.” she replied to his question breathily, before pressing her chest into his.

Her head tilted back and he knew she was close, her eyes were closed and little breaths were coming out of her slightly open mouth. Not being able to take it anymore he sat up, she gasped her hands immediately grasping his shoulders, he put his right hand on her lower back and guided them so she was on her back again. She wrapped one leg around him getting comfortable as he slowly thrust into her.

“Mmmmm.” Rae moaned, she slipped her arms around him, her nails lightly dragging down his back.

Her nails dragging down his back was driving him insane, he had to speed up. He hooked his hand under her left thigh and began pounding into her. Rae arched and smashed her lips to his dragging her nails harder down his back. She pulled away whimpering feeling herself coming close.

Her breaths were raspy and fast, “Come on.” Finn whispered as he looked into her eyes. She closed her eyes and tried to match his thrusts, he was kissing and biting her neck, this is what would send her over the edge, she cried out scraping her nails down his back. He thrust only two more times before coming so hard he let out a strangled cry. His breaths were fast as he lay on top of her, both their chests rising and falling rapidly. He rolled off of her onto his back throwing one arm over his face, he swallowed thickly trying to regain his breath.

When he removed his arm and looked over at Rae she had her eyes closed and a small smile on her lips. “Alright?” he asked.

She nodded then swallowed, “Yeah.” She replied letting out a stream of breath. “I just need a minute and possibly a shower if that’s okay?”

“Yeah, no problem.” He stated.

–

She was shivering, her feet were sticking out of the blanket, she tried to tuck them under but she was too long and couldn’t quite get them fully covered. So she shifted up trying to untuck the duvet to slide under, but it was no use she had to get out of bed to untuck it. She opened her eyes a little as she stood removing the throw blanket off and pulled the duvet back, she slid under the blanket and was ready for sleep to take her again.

Sighing she pulled the blanket up to her chin, “Its cold.”

“I know.” She sighed. A body shifted closer to her and slid their hand around her holding her to them. She wriggled back and locked herself into them, every curve of her body fitting perfectly to the contours of theirs.

A gruff sigh woke her enough to realize where she was, “Finn?”

“Hmm.” He hummed.

“I fell asleep.”

“Clearly not if you’re talking.” He grumbled.

“You know what I mean.”

“Just go to sleep, it’s late.” He said through a yawn then nuzzled into her.

She could sleep easily being so tired but she couldn’t understand why she fell asleep to begin with, why he let her fall asleep. This isn’t how things normally went and the last thing she wanted was to somehow get comfortable with this. This cuddling thing he was doing, it felt nice, but it was wrong on so many levels.

–

He rolled over feeling the space next to him was empty, he sighed and stretched before rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. He looked over to see she was gone. Sitting up he lifted the duvet off of him and swung his feet out of bed landing them hard on the wood floor. He stood and walked over to his dresser and fished out a pair of boxers.

After slipping them on he walked out of his bedroom to get a glass of water, but passing the bathroom he paused hearing the shower running. He knew it was Rae, because who else could it be. He lifted his closed hand up to rap his knuckles against the door but paused just before they made contact. He furrowed his eyebrows and pressed his ear to the door. She was singing. It was faint but he could hear her. Smiling to himself he went to the kitchen for his water.

–

Stepping out of the shower she wrapped a towel around herself, and began to dry off, luckily she kept a few things with her at all times for impromptu sleep overs at Chloe’s or Izzy’s, or hot sweaty sex with Finn. She put on her deodorant and spritzed herself with body spray. Finn had ripped her panties so she would have to go commando for a while but she was headed right home. She finished getting dressed then spritzed herself with her body spray again, always layering her scents. She hung the towel on the rack and made sure to clean up. When she was done she stepped out to see Finn eating a bowl of cereal.

“Hungry?” he asked.

“I’m okay, thanks, need to get home.”

“Okay.” He shrugged taking another bite of his cereal.

“See you later.” She said passing him.

“Laters.” He called as she opened the door. Once out in the hall she let out her held breath.

When she woke up she was turned over facing him, her head tucked under his chin, her face touching his chest, she had her arm around his waist holding him to her. He in turn was resting his chin on the top of her head, with his arm around her shoulders holding her, his legs tangled in hers. 

She doesn’t think he will remember, but even if he did he would hardly mention it, besides you can’t be held accountable for what way you turn in your sleep. That’s another thing, how was she able to sleep next to him no problem? She remembers him saying for her to just go to sleep and although she wanted to stay awake and possibly slip out, she didn’t, she fell asleep easily and was comfortable doing it.

–

Finn exhaled his held breath as soon as the door shut. He got up and put his half eaten bowl of cereal in the sink and went to his room to make his bed. He stood staring at her side, the side she slept on, sometimes he would still smell her on his sheets, it was always fresh, like spring, florally and lemony, it was nice, but it never lingered. When he woke the early morning sun was streaming through his curtain, he breathed in deep trying to relax back into a peaceful slumber and that’s when he smelt her lemony floral scent, he opened his eyes a crack to see she was facing him, he was holding her to him tightly. Almost all points of their bodies touching. His leg thrust between hers. She shifted slightly and let out a puff of air before squeezing him a little tighter. Once she settled he closed his eyes falling right back to sleep.

After making his bed finding the scent of her lingering this time around he decided to take a shower and get ready for the day.

–

“And how was your sleepover with Izzy, feeling better?” Her mum asked as she walked in the door.

“How did you know wh—“

“Well, I called Chloe’s and you weren’t there, so I rang Izzy, she said you were asleep already, you weren’t feeling well.”

“Oh, yeah, it was just my stomach. I’m gonna…” she trailed off heading for the stairs.

Once in her room she sat on her bed and picked up the phone to call Izzy. Izzy answered on the second ring. Rae thanked her for covering for her and she insisted it was no problem and was lucky her mum had mentioned she had already called Chloe looking for her. When Izzy asked where she really was she replied saying she couldn’t exactly say, Izzy seemed to accept it as she wondered if Rae would come over after work as she needed to speak with her about something. Rae agreed, then they exchanged their goodbyes.

–

Getting to work she found Archie was in speaking to Rob, she raised her eyebrows at him in a wondering sort of away and he just smiled smugly back. When she came back from putting her bag down Archie said he was just there to see her and was caught chatting with Rob while waiting.

“What’s up, Arch?”

“I’ve come to say that if you’re able to go camping you’ll be riding with me.” He smiled.

“Oh, alright, cool.” Her eyes shifted to Rob who was looking at them but then looked away when caught.

“What’s with Rob, huh?” she asked with a lopsided smile and a raised brow.

“Nothing, nothing…just chatted is all.”

“Suuure.” She teased.

“Honestly, it’s not like THAT we were just commiserating on experiences.”

Rae furrowed her brows, “Oh…ooooooh.” She drawled, “Got ya.”

“Anyway, I gotta go, supposed to meet Finn during his lunch..so I’ll probably see you later at our footie game.”

“Wait, what?” she asked as he walked away.

“Izzy will tell ya!” he said as he walked out the door.

She turned around thinking she really needed to stay in the loop more.

–

Finn was humming while washing his hands when he heard a knock behind him, “Just a sec, Arch.” He said as he dried them off.

“Chippie?” Archie asked.

Finn nodded, he followed Archie out and when they made it to the pavement they walked side by side.

“How’s work?” Archie asked.

“Work is work.” Finn shrugged.

“Still a man of few words I see.” Archie paused a second then added, “Unless you’re around Rae.”

Finn looked at Archie quickly, he couldn’t make out where he was going with this so he shrugged, “She thinks she knows everything about music.”

“So do you.” Archie retorted, “Besides, I heard you go to Town quite a bit.”

“From who?” Finn scoffed.

“From Rob.”

“Yeah, well, not like you’re going to find me at HMV.”

“True.”

“Anyway, camping.” Finn said changing the subject.

“Oh yeah, I’ve just been to see Rae about that. She’s riding with me.”

Finn nodded, “Who else is riding with you?”

“That’s it just me and Rae, the other cars are filled.”

“Who’s with me then?”

“You, Little Al, Lizard, Julia and Stacey.”

“Who decided this?” he asked annoyed as they neared the chippie.

“Chop, when you left the other night. He wanted to put Rae with you instead of Julia and Julia with me but I know how you two don’t get on that well so I told Chop Rae can ride with me…besides Stacey and Rae don’t have the best track record.”

“What do you mean? And how would you know?” Finn asked coming to a halt.

Archie just shrugged, and continued on the few steps to the chippie. Finn knew he couldn’t ask any further without it looking suspicious, he wondered if he should ask Rae but she’s never been very forthcoming. He only knew what she gave and the other stuff he figured out. Walking into the chippie Archie told him he had ordered for them so they took a seat.

“By the way, meet us in the park about 5, we’re gonna have a footie game.”

Finn nodded, “Chop said something about wanting to show off his skills, honestly, I think he just wants to impress Izzy, which is why he invited her. Maybe he’ll make a move sometime between now and the camping trip, god knows he planned it so he could probably share a tent with her.”

“Probably.” Finn responded.

“By the way, we’ve already been dubbed team skins.” Archie said rolling his eyes.

Finn winced internally, thinking how he was going to explain what happened to him.

“Sounds good.” He said as Archie went to collect their order.

–

“Do I not have time to change?” Rae asked Izzy as she came to collect her from work.

“No, the games going to start soon.” Izzy said looping her arm through Rae’s.

She didn’t want to wear her work shirt but time was of the essence it seemed. “So what did you want to talk to me about?”

“Blow jobs.” Izzy said bluntly. So bluntly Rae heard an elderly woman gasp in passing.

“Maybe we should wait until we get to the park where it’s less public to talk about that, okay?” Rae chuckled. Izzy nodded. Rae wondered what she could tell Izzy about them. She hardly knew what to do when she had first given one, lucky Chloe was so open or she really would have completely lost.

Entering the park they saw the boys in the distance gathered around Chop, Izzy pointed out a spot to sit as they walked closer. They were far enough away to talk discretely but close enough to watch. Izzy pulled her back pack off and pulled out a small blanket for them to sit on.

“Chop invited me to come and watch, that’s good right?” Izzy looked at Rae.

“Yeah.” Rae nodded as she pulled her sunglasses on, the sun was low making it brighter, “so what’s with all this mouth to south resuscitation talk? Hmm?” Rae asked.

“Well, the other night at the pub, the night you and Finn left early?”

“Oh, Finn left to?” Rae asked.

“Yeah he did.”

“Okayyyy…” Rae drawled.

“Well, Chloe said something like I needed to be prepared for camping if I do go because that’s probably where Chop will make an actual move…and that it probably wouldn’t be full on sex but…other…stuff.”

Rae couldn’t help but laugh but also feel a little sad for Izzy and Chloe’s advice, “Izzy, remember when you went on a date with Peter?”

“Yeah?”

“Well, did any of his moves consist of wanting to shove his bits in your mouth on the first date?”

“No.” she shook her head.

“And would you have let him if he wanted to on the first date?”

“No.”

“Okay, well I can tell you right now, Chop has a lot more respect for you than to just immediately jump into any sort of sexual act. He’d never do that with you. But even if he does want to do something, you don’t have to do anything with him.” 

“I know but..”

“Iz, you’re not going to get a guy to like you by doing whatever you think they want you to do.”

“But Chloe said..”

“Yeah, I know..she means well, I suppose…but just Iz trust ME on this would ya.”

“Thanks, Rae.”

“Anytime.” She smiled.

“Besides, I don’t think there’s enough time to learn how to give a proper blow job between now and next weekend.”

Rae choked on air as Izzy spoke so plainly, “I wouldn’t worry about it, Iz”

“Wait, does that mean you can go?”

“Don’t know yet.” She sighed. “Oh my god, Chop is skins!” she gasped looking up.

Rae turned her head from Izzy to the field, as she scanned the field her eyes landed on Finn he was pulling his shirt over his head, “Fuck.” She muttered to herself.

“Oh poor Finn, I wonder what happened to his back?” Izzy worried.

–

“Eh, Eh, Finn, which bird clawed up your back?” Chop teased.

“Piss off.” He mumbled.

“Now, now, Finny share with the class. Was it Stacey? She’s been after you for a while now.”

“No!” he said louder than he intended.

“Well, then?” Chop looked at him like he could wait all day.

“If you must know, I went to me dads the other night, turns out he got a fucking cat. I stayed over having a catch up and the fucking thing slept on my back, when my dad burst in me room in the morning it freaked out and scratched me up.”

“Well, that’s no fun.” He said his shoulders slumping.

“Do you think of anything else Chop?” Archie asked.

“Sometimes.” He shrugged. 

“Let’s just get on with the game.”

–

Rae and Izzy were silent most of the game, only chatting a little. When it was over Chop, Finn and Archie plopped down on the grass in front of them. “Chippie?” Chop suggested.

Izzy nodded and Rae said sure, as did Archie, Finn declined saying, “I need to get home and shower.”

As the five walked towards the chippie Archie and Chop fell into conversation with Izzy explaining to her a penalty that had happened whilst they were playing. Finn walked with them as it was near his and before he would turn on the next corner to go home she whispered, “Sorry about your back.”

She looked over at him as subtly as she could, he shrugged and said, “I’ll live.”

Reaching the corner where they would part the others turned to say goodbye, but before he could turn to head home Chop asked, “By the way, what is the name of your dad’s cat?”

Finns eyes flitted to Rae’s for the briefest of moments, and she is hundred percent positive he smiled very subtly before looking to Chop, “Raymond.” He said, then turned around heading home.

“Strange name for a cat.” Izzy wondered aloud.

As the three continued towards the chippy baffled by the name of Finn’s dads cat Rae couldn’t help but laugh at the explanation for his back and also the name he gave it, “Cheeky bastard.” Rae muttered as she ambled along catching up to the others.

–

The week had passed rather quickly for her liking but that’s how things go when something you don’t really want to do is creeping up on you. Izzy had called her saying she was still working on being able to go and to not to give up hope yet. Rae figured she should just call Rob and ask for the weekend off in the event Izzy would get permission at the last possible second. Rob agreed with no problem telling her he would see her Monday.

It wouldn’t be until just after eleven that Izzy would call back in tears saying she couldn’t go. Rae listened to her as she cried down the line. Then suggested they have a sleepover the next day, she had already taken the time and there would be no better way to spend it than with Izzy.

“That’s okay. You go.” Izzy sniffled.

“Iz, I was only going for you.” Rae spoke softly.

“I know…but I think I want to be alone, I’ll call you if I change my mind.”

“Okay.” Rae answered. There was a click and Rae sighed feeling sorry for her friend as she put the phone back.

She went to bed sad but relieved she wasn’t going camping.

—

The next morning she was up bright and early. She showered and went down stairs to eat breakfast planning on being lazy the rest of the day, or maybe just go to Town to browse and give Rob a hard time.

Popping the last bit of toast in her mouth there was a knock at the door. She went over to answer it, “Archie?” she said in surprise, “I thought you would all be gone by now.”

“There was a slight change of plans.”

“Come in.” she said.

When he was in she asked, “So no camping then?”

“No, the others are still on their way and I was hoping I could convince you to still come with even though Izzy can’t.”

“What? No. me and outdoors we don’t mix.” She said shaking her head.

“Please, Rae…as much as I hate camping at least I can say I did something whilst I was home for the summer and it would be so much more bearable if you were there too.”

“Don’t do this to me Archie.” Rae whined.

“Pleeeeease, Rae…you already have the time off. I promise we will leave as soon as the sun comes up.”

“And we can share my tent and just chat all night, not even risk sleeping.”

“Fine, but you’re putting it up by yourself I’m not helping at all.” She huffed.

“Deal. Thank you.” He said hugging her.

She told him to wait while she went to her room to pack a few things. She grabbed her rolled sleeping bag putting under her arm as she scribbled a note to her mum saying in the end she was going camping.

As the two set off Rae asked, “So what happened?”

“Oh, Chop decided not to go.”

“Why? It was his bloody idea!”

“Well, as you know, Izzy couldn’t make it.”

“Yeah.” Rae nodded.

“Well, he didn’t want to go if she couldn’t but everyone who was riding with Chop wouldn’t have been able to go if he didn’t, so Finn said if Barney could drive Chop’s car he would lend Chop his scooter for the weekend and it was all agreed.”

“That was nice of Finn.” Rae said.

“Yeah.” Archie nodded.

–

For the third time in the hour they’ve been there he’s had to remove Stacey’s hand from his leg. He isn’t even exactly sure how or why she was invited. But he figured Chop just needed people to make it look like a massive thing all because he was too scared to just tell Izzy he liked her. He wished he could have backed out too, a weekend spent with Rae would have been better than this. Monday he would see her or late Sunday night and they could make up for lost time. 

Finn groaned as Stacey upgraded to slinging her arm around his shoulders and whispering in his ear, he winced and then turned to look at her, with a horrified feeling, “Finn, can I interrupt you and Stacey to ask for a hand?” Archie said.

Finn turned his head to see Archie and Rae looking at him, he jumped up immediately walking towards the pair taking the tent from Archie. He tried to figure out what Rae must have thought seeing that but he couldn’t, her eyes were covered by her black round sunglasses, the very same ones he was also wearing.

“I’m just gonna go find a place to sit.” Rae said then walked off.

“I didn’t know Rae was still coming? Is that where you went?” Finn asked Archie.

“Yeah.”

“Oh, okay. Well, where is her tent then?”

“We’re sharing.” Archie said then walked passed Finn to find a spot.

As Finn helped Archie set up the tent his eyes kept wandering over to Rae, she was sitting by herself with a copy of NME. He wondered if he would be able to get her alone for a minute.

“Alright, Finn?”

“Hmm. Yeah.” He responded to Archie, “Fine.”

–

The sun was setting as Finn and Little Al lit the campfire. Rae had stuck by Archie the majority of the time, talking with him and Barney in their own little circle. The few times she had caught a glimpse of Finn he was talking to Little Al and Lizard, with Stacey glued to his side, the others talking amongst each other.

She had managed to stay away from Stacey for the most part but when they all moved to sit around the campfire now that the sun had set, she had somehow found herself sitting between Archie and Finn, Stacey walked up asking, “Do you think you can make room?”

Rae sighed holding her tongue ready to move closer to Archie but a hand grabbed her left arm and was pulling her, “Don’t be rude, May.” Finn said pulling her to scoot next to him.

Rae moved in Finn’s direction and Stacey huffed, “I meant the other way.” But in the end sat next to her and Archie when Lizard announced it was time for spooky ghost stories.

As the stories went on Rae looked around noting everyone seemed a little scared of the story Lizard was telling but when she reached Finn he looked at her and his face contorted as if to say, “This is dumb.” She shrugged in return.

It was going on ten and she figured if she could go to sleep now and wake up earlier the sooner she would be out of here. So when there was a break in between stories she leaned back and reached over smacking Archie lightly on the back that caused him to nearly jump out of his skin.

“Calm down.” Rae chuckled, “I’m going to bed.” She added.

“Don’t leave me.” Archie pouted.

“Let her go, who cares.” Stacey said.

Rae rolled her eyes at the back of Stacy’s head then said, “You’ll be fine.” To reassure Archie.

Making her way into her tent she took one last look back at the circle and she saw Stacey cuddling up next to Finn.

–

“Come on, get off.” Finn grumbled.

“I’m scared.” Stacey trembled.

“I’m off to bed too.” He said leaving in the middle of the story.

He was just glad that Rae was walking to her tent before she saw, he had watched her pick up her bag and walk to the tent but was then distracted when Stacey looped her arm through his draping herself all over him.

Getting in his tent he slid off his shoes and his jeans and got into his sleeping bag. He reached for his Walkman and slipped his earbuds in pressing play hoping that they could leave as soon as the sun came up.

–

“Rae. Rae.”

Rae grumbled turning over in her sleeping bag, “What, Archie?”

“I need you to come with me.” He whispered.

“Where?” she asked rubbing her tired eyes.

“I need ta piss and I don’t want to go by myself.” He urged.

“Archie, are you afraid of the dark?” she teased.

“Just…please Rae?”

“Fuck, okay.” She huffed.

Archie went out of the tent and held the flap open for her as she climbed out, he switched the torch on and kept it aimed at the ground away from the other tents. 

As they took a few steps they paused when they heard a noise sharing a curious look, the noise was then followed by a hushed, “Finn.” And then a moan followed by a drawn out, “Finn.”

“Come on.” Archie said as he pulled Rae. He led them to a tree where he walked around to take care of business.

Rae wasn’t sure how she was feeling all she knows is that it was a sickly feeling and she needed to get out of there. When Archie came back around the tree she felt her stomach bubbling and head spinning then she was doubled over vomiting.

“Rae!” Archie worried, he rushed to her putting a hand on her back soothing her.

When she stood up right, she wiped her mouth off, “Alright?” he asked.

“Yeah.’ She nodded, “I think it was just drinking and not having eaten much.”

“Come on. I have some crisps you can try to eat a little to calm your stomach.”

Rae nodded and he led her back to the campsite with his hand on her lower back. As they approached Stacey was coming out of Finn’s tent, and with the brightness of the moon Rae could see Stacey smiling smugly at them as she stood up right and adjusted her shirt by pulling at the hem; she wiped her bottom lip off and walked away as the tent was being zipped up.

“Here.” Archie said handing Rae the bag of crisps as they settled in their tent. 

“Thanks.” Rae said taking them.

“I’m even feeling a bit squeamish having seen Stacey come out of Finns tent. I mean I’m not too surprised…but still.”

“Why?” Rae asked.

“I don’t wanna say….I mean Finn is one of my best mates and I guess who he does whatever with is up to him, but Stacey, gah, she’s a cow.”

“Oh, I know.”

“I know you know.” Archie said. “Can’t believe it, I mean I had my suspicions.” he added shaking his head.

After sharing a few crisps in silence they laid down. Rae was thinking over what Archie said as she was unable to sleep until finally she felt too constricted and couldn’t be in the confines of a tent anymore. “Archie, are you awake?”

“Wide awake.” He replied quickly.

“Then can we please get the fuck out of here.” She looked at him trying to make him out in the dark.

He sat up abruptly, “I thought you’d never ask.”

They gathered their stuff and rolled up their sleeping bags. They set them down ready to take apart the tent but when Archie spotted Barney coming back from the pissing tree he jogged over to him. When he came back he said that he told him she wasn’t feeling well and he was taking her home and if he could mind the tent in the morning and he agreed saying it was no problem.

–

Finn looked at his watch, it was going on ten, he glanced back at Rae and Archie’s tent, he hadn’t heard any movements or sounds since he’s been up.

“Hey, Lizard.” He called, “Better wake up Archie and Rae if we want to be heading out soon.”

“Oh, no, Barney said they left last night, Rae wasn’t feeling well. So Barney said he’d take the tent down for them.” He explained then walked off towards the others.

Finn looked back at the tent his face contorted in confusion and his stomach dropping. Rae was sick, they left, why didn’t Archie say anything?

–

Rae woke late in the afternoon. She hadn’t went to sleep right away when she got home like she thought she would. She was a little mad and disappointed in herself. And sooner or later she was going to have to confront the reason she was feeling that way, she should have set boundaries in the first place.

After lying in bed thinking over what she was going to do or how to proceed she decided she needed a shower to wash away the day before, to get a clear head. When she was done and dressed the phone was ringing, it was a very chirpy Izzy inviting her over.

When Rae arrived at Izzy’s house she had pizza and soda ready for a night full of gossip. Settled in Izzy’s room, Izzy sitting on her bed a pillow clutched to her chest the smile Rae saw when she first walked in still plastered to Izzy’s face. She asked, “How was your weekend?”

Izzy sighed dreamily, “It was the best.”

“Chop have anything to do with it?” Rae asked cheekily.

Izzy nodded while munching on her bottom lip, “Oh, Rae. He came over, said he didn’t go camping because he wanted to spend time with me, and said that if I couldn’t go neither would he.”

She stared off into space and Rae couldn’t help but smile for her friend who was clearly remembering the day before, “So what happened?”

“Well, we went for a drive, Finn let Chop borrow his scooter. Then when we came back we had a picnic in the garden and stayed out until dark and just laid back on this blanket looking at the stars, and then…” she squealed trailing off, “He asked me out…proper asked me on a date.”

“Did you say yes?” Rae teased.

“Of course…but I tried not seem so eager, to let on that I’ve been waiting forever for him to ask me. We’re going out on Tuesday night.”

“I’m so happy for you, Iz, it’s about time.” Rae smiled.

“Thanks, Rae. I can’t wait to tell Chloe.” She beamed.

“You told me first?” Rae asked.

“Of course, silly.” Izzy grinned then launched forward pulling Rae into a hug.

Rae hugged Izzy back wishing she had the courage to tell Izzy what was going on with her, maybe after everything ended she would tell her. Izzy had Chop, maybe that means she didn’t need to go with her anymore to see him, to see Finn or casually stalk him. Maybe things would be as it was before.

–

It had been three days since the camping trip and he hasn’t really seen Rae at all. She didn’t come out to the pub and when he would pop into Town she always seemed busy with a customer. All he had left was to go to her house to find out what was going on. Luckily he knew she would be home alone, her mum and step dad were working and he knew Chop was at the pub with Izzy. He was glad to hear that finally happened, took long enough, he thought.

Walking up to her house he noticed some lights were on so she was definitely home, he ran his fingers through his fringe shaking it out before knocking. He waited a moment and as he was going to knock again the door opened.

“Finn?” she asked like she was shocked to see him.

“Hey.” He replied.

They stared at each other a moment, it was like this weight that had been pressing down on his chest was lifted upon seeing her. Though the look she was giving him was less than welcoming.

“Can I come in?”

“Oh, sure.” She said and stepped aside.

He stepped in and went into her lounge, “What’s up?” she asked.

“Just came to chat.” He shrugged.

“About?”

“What happened…with camping? You got sick?”

“Uh, yeah…me and nature…we don’t mix well.”

“Are you okay now?” he worried, she was being very standoffish, more than usual.

“Yep, all better.”

“So you being sick is not why I haven’t seen you in a few days?”

She shrugged and said, “I’m sure you’ve managed just fine without me.”

“What does that mean?” he asked, a little taken aback by her comment.

She mumbled something that he didn’t quite hear, “What was that?” he asked taking a step forward.

“I didn’t really want to do this now…but no time like the present.”

“Do what?” he asked confused.

“Look, Finn, this..” she began, motioning back and forth between them, “I’m done…I mean it was nice and I guess we should have talked and discussed some ground rules. It was silly of me to just assume I was the only one. But now…I just…I feel kind of gross….and worried. I mean…we did do it a few times without a condom, I mean I’m on the pill but that doesn’t protect you from other stuff, know what I mean…” She rambled on and he was just staring at her mouth trying to put together what she was saying.

–

Rae was looking at him and he seemed generally confused by what she was saying, maybe he didn’t know she knew or was just going to play dumb.

“What the fuck are you on about?” he asked in confusion.

“I know you’ve been with Stacey and that’s…well, your business but a fucking heads up would have been nice. If I would have known you had been putting it around, well…I’m sorry things would never have gotten this far.”

“Putting.it.around.” Finn repeated, cautiously, then said, “Rae, seriously what the fuck…who told you I was with Stacey…or anyone else for that matter?”

“No one needed to tell me Finn…I heard Stacy in your tent moaning, so did Archie and we saw her come out of it. And you can’t expect me to believe that was the first time.” She exhausted.

“Moaning in my tent? What? She was in there yeah but nothing happened, she tried it on but I said no and to leave.”

“Then why was she saying your name?”

“Probably because she was trying to wake me up, I fell asleep with my earbuds in, I mean when I woke up I think I accidently hit her with one whipping it out of my ear.”

Rae looked at him in disbelief, “I find that hard to believe.”

“It’s the truth.” He rushed out taking a step towards her. “You really think, I’ve been sleeping with other people?” he asked after a moment of silence.

She shrugged, “Wow.” He laughed humorlessly. “You think that little of me? Well, how do I know you haven’t been about with other guys, huh? You wanna accuse me, I can easily accuse you…there have been several days where I’ve gone without tending to you.”

“Oh piss off!” she scoffed, “As if.”

“No, you started this, coming up with ridiculous accusations, maybe you’re accusing me to clear your own guilty conscious, thinking if you can believe that was something I could do…it would make you feel better.” He shook his head.

“Now you’re fucking delusional.”

“Why? Why, Rae? Why is it so easy for you to accuse me but I can’t accuse you?”

She felt the tears forming in her eyes, she refused to cry, she had told her self she wasn’t going to cry, “Well!?” he said sternly.

“No one else has wanted me…in any way….ever” She said as she turned her face away to wipe a stray tear.

“What?” he asked so soft she hardly heard him.

“I don’t even know why you did.” 

“I couldn’t have been the only one ever.” He said baffled.

She looked at him and shrugged, “What are you saying?” he asked carefully.

“What do you think I’m saying?” his mouth was slightly agape as his eyes scanned hers, she sniffed and wiped her nose on the cuff of her long sleeve, she looked him dead in the eye, “I was a virgin when we had sex. You were my first…ever…for everything.”

“What…” he trailed off.

“Please just go.” She sobbed as she hurried to the stairs and up to her room.

–

Finn was sure his heart dropped into his stomach. As he watched her retreat he felt dizzy and sick. He needed to talk to her, but he knows that she’s not going to be letting him in anytime soon. He knows that when her wall is up, it’s up until she wants it to come down. He wasn’t even sure what to say or how to say it but before anything he needed her to know, to believe, that he was definitely not sleeping with anyone else. And once he was convinced she truly believed him then maybe they could discuss the other important detail that had been brought to light.

He left her house heading straight for home, his Dad’s house that is. There was no way he could go back to his, the place swarming with memories of Rae. He just couldn’t not until this situation was resolved.

–

Rae cried into her pillow, she had never felt more pathetic in her life. What must he be thinking? Why did it hurt so much to end things with him? She knew it was never going to be permanent, knew that it was never going to be more than fucking. Maybe it was just how it had taken place. A part of her thought maybe if she ignored him he would just move on. But somewhere in a deep corner of her mind she knew that wouldn’t be the case no matter how much she wished it to be. She thought it would have been easier if he admitted what she assumed, but he denied it with such sincerity that no matter how much she didn’t want to believe it, in her heart of hearts she knew he was speaking the truth. And then for the icing on the cake, to hit him with the fact that he took her innocence, that he is the only one to know her that intimately. She feels embarrassed and humiliated beyond epic proportions, what must he think of her, the kind of girl that would give it up to someone she didn’t even like, with only a wall separating the act from a room full of people.

—-

It had been five days since it happened. He had been cooped up in his old room at his Dad’s if he wasn’t at work, only a few times did he go to his flat to get clothes. He never went past Town to see if she was there, he would take the long way around to avoid bumping in to her. Never answered the phone at his Dad’s, Gary just re-directing the calls for him. He had been contemplating going back to hers, he had enough time to figure out what he wanted to say, what he needed to say. How he felt.

He rolled out of bed and grabbed his jacket shrugging it on. Shouting at his dad he would be back that he was just going to get some more stuff from his like he’d been doing, but really he needed to think. It was a five minute drive to his place, when he got inside his flat he went to his room to open a window, it was a bit musty inside as it had been closed up. He grabbed a bag and put a few clean clothes in there, he grabbed another jacket and his Walkman.

Putting everything on the settee he went to the kitchen to get some water from the tap. He set the empty glass down on the counter with a quenched sigh, and a loud thud, which caused a set of keys to jingle. He picked up the lone key, a brass key to his flat, it was connected to a silver ring that had a guitar key chain dangling from it. He wanted to give it to her the Friday before the camping trip, explain that it’s for when they meet at his separately and she won’t have to wait outside. But they never made it to his, they had a quickie in his car, and then he dropped her off at home because she needed to wait for Izzy’s phone call.

Curling his fingers into a ball around the key he pounded the counter top once. He shook his head and went to his room; sitting on his bed he looked over to the night stand and picked up a roughly folded piece of paper. Unfolding the note he had written a few days before he contemplated on how he was ever going to get close enough to tell her everything.

–

He hadn’t been by hers or Town, hasn’t been to the pub, she does know he goes to work, thanks to Chop. Everyone seemed baffled as to what happened to him. Chop joking that he’s finally turned into a grumpy old man; that he could probably be found on a park bench cursing as he throws pieces of bread at the birds.

She knows she is wrong to think he would come by after what she accused him of, so she doesn’t blame him. But she needs to see him to apologize, to say she overreacted but she thought it was done in good conscious at the time. To tell him that she was sorry about not telling him she was a virgin.

She studied her feet as she walked, he probably wasn’t going to be home. Why would he be, she thought. But she had to try, had to do something other than mope around.

–

Finn started his car and was ready to put it in drive when he said, “Oh, fuck.” He turned his car off and hopped out. He hurried back to his flat and made his way to his bedroom to shut the window he left open. After the window was closed he shut the curtain then stared at it for a moment before sliding it back open some.

Getting into the living area he took one last look around his flat making sure everything was in order, when satisfied he opened his door and took a step out but was abruptly stopped, “Rae?”

She looked up at him with wet cheeks and a sad smile as she shrugged her shoulders. He took a tentative step forward, he searched her eyes looking for something, but other than sadness he could only see himself.

“I’m sorry.” They spoke in unison.

They shared a soft smile, Finn gently lifted his hand touching his palm to her cheek, his thumb swiping away a damp streak, “Don’t cry, girl.” His palm slid from her cheek around to the base of her neck. He didn’t need much effort to bring her in for a hug, she took a step and wrapped her arms around him tucking her face in the crook of his neck.

He took a deep breath inhaling her, filling himself up with her, his senses kicking in as he wrapped himself around her.

“Wanna come in?” he asked, softly. She nodded against his shoulder, and then lifted her head, he smiled gently while pushing her hair back. Taking her hand he led her into his flat.

They sat on his settee shoulders and thighs touching, until Rae shifted lifting her right leg and tucking it under her left and turning so she could face him, but wasn’t looking at him.

“I..I just wanted to say sorry, I feel….horrible, really horrible.” She spoke as she picked at her nails, “What I said was…I don’t even want to repeat it but I hope you can understand what it seemed like from my point of view.” She looked up at him quickly and then back down.

He placed his hand on top of hers when he saw she was picking the skin around her a nails, “I understand.” He said softly, yet firmly, she looked up at him and he continued, “And I’m sorry for accusing you of….” He trailed off.

She nodded, “Yeah,” she sighed. “And about the other thing I mentioned…I don’t know what to say…I guess I should have told you.” She looked down, embarrassed.

“Yeah, you probably should’ve.”

“Things probably wouldn’t have gotten this far.” She laughed humorlessly.

He was going to reply but paused thinking about what to say. He wasn’t entirely sure this wouldn’t have happened, it may have prolonged things but he feels it might have eventually happened, him and her. If he would have known that she was a virgin he probably wouldn’t have gone through with it, drunk and a room full of people one room over couldn’t have been ideal for her, but if she really wanted to, wanted it to be him then, okay yeah but under different circumstances.

“I wouldn’t say that.” he said, then continued with, “That night…you didn’t…feel..I didn’t pressure you did I?”

“No” she said her eyes shooting up to his, “I..I wanted to..it crossed my mind to tell you but I wanted you in that moment…wanted IT..and I figured you would y’know….KNOW but it would be too late.”

He vaguely remembers her being tight, but he thought it was mostly due to how close she was when he finally entered her, she was clenching around him wonderfully, it was hard for him to last, he had to pace himself. He had gone down on her for a bit and figured she was just ready to come. Which she did, twice. If he recalls correctly.

“I thought…y’know..it was a little…. but not that kind of tight.”

“Yeah, well, I was pretty ready with all the foreplay.” She looked down, and he couldn’t help but smile at the blush on her cheeks. “Anyway, it’s done, it is what is and I don’t regret it. It happened, I just didn’t..don’t..I don’t want you to think bad of me…different of me, for how it happened…the pathetic fat gi–”

“I don’t…I wouldn’t.” he shook his head quickly, assuring her, not wanting to hear her put herself down.

“At least now we can be friends.” She was smiling genuinely, and he wanted to say more, say what he was really feeling but couldn’t find the words, he hadn’t seen her in so long he didn’t want to tell her and risk not seeing her or her laughing in his face.

But the words were on the tip of his tongue, maybe I don’t want to be your friend and then before he knew it he was saying them, “Maybe, I don’t want to be your friend.” Her eyebrows furrowed, and then her lips turned up into a small seductive smile.

She licked over her bottom lip then pulled it softly with her teeth, she cocked her head, “Is that right?” She spoke lustily. She sat up lifted her left leg over his lap to straddle him she was kissing down his neck and his hands were immediately on her hips, she pulled away briefly to pull her tee over her head, leaving her in her vest top.

“That’s…not…what…” he tried to speak but she had him breathless, with the touch of her lips and the way she was grinding on him, he couldn’t help but give in.

Her hands carded through his hair tugging slightly, his hands slid down her hips to rest on her ass until he was sliding his hands under her thighs, he picked her up and stood all in one swift movement.

–

“Finn!” Rae gasped as she tightened her arms around his neck, he carried her to his bedroom and let her slide down to stand. Standing in front of him she was smiling but his face was serious, she leaned forward to kiss him, she went hungrily where as he was soft and slow. She slowed down to his pace her hands seeking out any part of him to hold onto that would keep her standing. Every touch, felt different. He pressed a soft kiss to her neck, he sucked on the soft skin nipping at times, she felt as though she was on fire, her grip on his shirt becoming stronger.

She felt a shift in her as he pulled away, his eyes locked on hers as he moved his hands to the hem of her vest top, she lifted her arms and he slowly pulled it off of her. His lips were back on hers but only just, as he began to kiss down her neck and chest. He placed a whisper light kiss on the indentation of her waist, leaving a patch of goosebumps. He made a wet path back up to her breasts as he unbuttoned her jeans. She hooked her thumb in them helping him pull them down, as he nibbled on the tops of her breasts.

Now kissing the hollow of her neck her eyes rolled back as she aggressively moaned into his ear. He reached around unclasping her bra, his fingers nimble as he pulled the straps down her arms. His thick fingers brushing over her pert nipples before softly cupping and squeezing her breasts in tandem. With her fingers back in his hair she tugged slightly, causing him to growl low in his throat. He kissed a path down to her left breast until he was licking over her nipple. Humming in pleasure as he proceeded to lick over right nipple it hardening so much it ached. He brought his face to hers kissing her gently, his lips barely touching hers before pulling back slightly just to kiss her lips again and again. He rested his left hand on her cheek and his right on her lower back and slowly he walked her backwards until he was guiding her down to lay on the bed.

She was breathing heavily, every nerve end in her body alive, alit with passion and hunger. His eyes locked on hers as he reached behind him pulling his shirt over his head, she bit her lip as she watched him unbutton his jeans and ever so slowly pull them down, over the hard contours of his body. The ache between her thighs was strong but the flutter in her stomach was stronger.

This felt different, all of it, everything about this scenario had her feeling different, warmer. They’ve done it over and over, and yet this felt brand new, like it was their first real time.

Leaving his boxers on he crawled up the bed parting her legs. He hovered over her, his hands resting on either side of her head. His face was set, soft but serious, his eyes beyond black, she brushed her fingers over his lips before leaning up to kiss him. Pressing her lips to his caused a ripple of tingles down her body, she held his face between her hands to steady herself as the kiss intensified.

His right hand soon smoothed down her body and under the material of her panties, he pressed two fingers to her clit, rubbing small circles. Moaning into their kiss caused her to pull away for a breath. He placed delicate kisses down her jaw and neck and chest until he was licking across and sucking on her nipples once more. She gripped the duvet with one hand while the other was running through his hair. Making his way down her body he removed his hand and he hooked his thumbs to pull down the material. She lifted up watching him as he tossed them aside. He placed a kiss on her knees and then on her thighs as he parted her legs more so he could nestle between them.

With her heart pounding and her cunt pulsating he licked up her slit. Her right hand went to the back of his head. As he continued to lick her, he slipped one finger in causing her to moan and writhe. She felt warm all over, her toes wanting to curl as he massaged her insides. Parting her lips he sucked on her clit, her legs wanting to close but she resisted. She gripped the duvet tighter as her breathing increased, she removed her right hand from his hair to cup her breast pinching and pulling her nipple.

He brought her close but didn’t tip her over. She took in a gulp of air her chest rising and falling, as the burning sensations coursing through her wavered. He sat up sliding his boxers off before he hovered back over her, kissing her lightly; when he made to move she held him by the shoulders continuing the kiss. She could feel him pressing into her but she craved his lips, his kiss.

Breaking away from the kiss she took a breath, “Alright?” he whispered. She nodded, he pecked her lips softly before reaching for his bed side table. She put her hand on his arm to stop him, looking at him she shook her head, “Sure?” he asked, she nodded.

Reaching down he rubbed his cock along her slit, she bit her lip in anticipation, she could feel the burn warming again, slowly taking over her body. With his eyes locked on hers he pushed into her, she let out a small breath and closed her eyes as he filled her up, her body prickled all over with an exquisite sensation, like nothing she had ever felt before.

She grasped his back as he slowly pushed in and out of her. Opening her eyes she saw his were closed, his eyebrows slightly furrowed.

“Mmmmm.” She moaned as he pushed in deeper. She relished in the way his back muscles flexed under her fingers, and lightly dug her blunt nails into his skin.

His right palm rested on her cheek causing her to open her eyes, his eyes bore deep into hers, as their bodies rocked slowly, back and forth back and forth like a gentle wave. It felt like he was fused to her, so much so that she began to dread the burning in her belly. She was close but didn’t want him to remove himself from her. She leaned up kissing him, massaging her tongue against his; his pace slowing so he was barely moving inside her.

He shifted only a fraction and it caused her to clench in pleasure, she was ready to tip over the edge, she wrapped her legs around him and he barely upped his pace. She pulled away from his lips wanting to look in his eyes as she came. She touched her hand to his and he slowed only enough to lace his fingers through hers and press her their joined hands into the bed above her head. They held each other’s gaze for a mere second as the pleasure was building deliciously. She squeezed his hand as he rocked into her. It felt like everything faded away, and all that existed were her and him. Opening her eyes to look at him, she came digging her right hand into his back, her nails scrapping down, as she fought the urge to close her eyes, her legs tightening around him. Her breathing heavy as she held onto him, his breathing was becoming shallow and his lips just centimeters away from hers, he let out a strangled groan as he came; as it trailed off his eyes opened and he kissed her.

She kissed him feeling tears pricking behind her eyelids, she was so overcome with emotion it was all she could do. He dropped his weight on her and held her as they kissed. Sliding himself out of her as they continued to kiss he then proceeded to lie on his side and guide her to face him. Her stomach was fluttering and she felt jittery all over. He pulled out of the kiss, and for fear of saying something she would regret she bit her lip and looked down. 

He moved closer to her his leg wanting to nudge between hers, a rush of tingly warmth washed over her body and she rolled back slightly. “I should go.” She whispered.

He put his hand on her arm preventing her, “It’s late, you don’t have to.”

She nodded, he moved closer to her again, but she yawned and pulled back, feeling what was between her legs she said, “I just need to use the bathroom really quick.”

Finn nodded and removed his hand from her and she slipped out of the bed and picked up his shirt pulling it on. She felt too exposed, not just with her body but her emotions like he would be able to see everything she was feeling.

After cleaning herself up she splashed some water on her face to calm herself, she looked at herself in the mirror wondering when this happened. She was expectant and prepared for the affect he had on her body, but she felt bombarded by the affect he now had on her emotions, she was nowhere near the realm of being prepared for that.

Coming out of the bathroom he had turned down the covers and was tucked inside, she smiled small and turned off the light before walking around to slide in. As soon as she was under he moved closer to her, it made her heart skip and pound in her ears.

“Goodnight Rae.” He murmured as his arm rested on her waist.

“Goodnight Finn.”

–

Reluctantly she fell asleep, it was hard not to, she was too comfortable he made it so easy. She woke suddenly realizing where she was, but he wasn’t next to her, at least that she could feel. She felt blindly behind her and felt he was turned away from her. She breathed slowly fearing she might wake him as she gently moved the covers and slipped out of bed. She tip toed through his room and to the living area and began to pick up her discarded clothes. Her top took a moment to find but found it, as it somehow landed on the kitchen table. She picked it up and decided to just shove it in her bag and wear his home. But as she shoved the shirt in her backpack it made a crinkling noise, she froze a minute hoping it didn’t wake him up. She gathered she must have left a candy wrapper or crisps package in there for it to make that noise.

Opening the door she took one last look back before exiting his flat.

–

It had been three days since he saw her. Waking up that morning to find her gone once again hurt him in a way he never thought it could. He knew now for sure that he couldn’t tell her, that the feelings burning within him would never be returned, he was stupid to be so flippant with his emotions, but he couldn’t help it, it just happened.

And what’s worse is that he has no idea what he did what with the stupid list he wrote about her went, he for sure thought he left it on the table in the kitchen but it wasn’t there. But he figured it didn’t matter, because it’s not like he was ever going to show her, tell her, though he did think about it. It was mainly that he just wanted to write down to his thoughts and have written proof that the only thing that was crazy about him was his feelings for her. That through all of this bickering and fucking he ended up head over heels crazy for her. And he wanted to tell her, list off all the reasons he liked her, be prepared in case she had questions, even read it straight from the page if he had to. 

–

It was such a shock going to his to apologize only to later realize what her true feelings were for him. After she snuck out she recounted some of things he had mentioned before, he knew so much about her, things she knows she never told him, but suspects that he just listens when she speaks. She realized that he liked her to the point of listening and taking in everything she said keeping it tucked away.

Looking over at her desk, the crumpled paper looming over her, his were words echoing in her head. She found it when she emptied her bag, it was wrapped up in her shirt, and after she read it she wanted to believe it some joke, something cruel just to mess with her, but no matter how hard she tried she just couldn’t because she knew him. She thought she’d be happy to find out that he felt the same way about her, that her feelings were reciprocated. But this is all so new to her, and it seemed that he had feelings long before she did. Thinking back she knew she must have felt something deep or she would never have been upset with him all the times she was, that it shouldn’t have mattered because she was supposed to not like him or care what he said, but in the end it did matter.

She got off her bed walked over to her desk and picked up the crumpled piece of paper. She knows she was not meant to find it but it happened, and maybe it was for a reason. Walking back over to her bed she sat down and re-read over the page.

About May

*So funny.

*Such an amazing friend.

*Caring

* Eye rolls and scoffs, drive me crazy, can’t get enough.

*The soft sounds she makes while sleeping.

*The way her body fits to mine.

*Kissing her puts air in my lungs, color in my world.

*Music, knows more than me, and it makes me want to sit and listen to her all day.

I want you to want me, I need you to need me….

*Beautiful, inside and out

Wishing you’d come see me, wishing you’d let me in. So I can tell you. Wishing I could wake up with you in my arms, to feel your warmth and just lay with you all day. Wishing I could say I miss you, and I need you by my side. Wishing I could tell you I don’t regret our time together. Wishing, just wishing.

Reading it again brought tears to her eyes, it didn’t seem complete it was almost like he was writing out a list of things he liked about her and maybe wanted to tell her, along with some of his scribbled feelings. Some things were crossed out to the point where she couldn’t read them, there were little music notes and hearts drawn all around the page. The Cheap Trick lyric made her heart lurch, he liked her, it never said to what extent but he really liked her. And one thing she knew for sure was she liked him, really liked him.

The ball was in her court again and she just needed the right move.

–

“What are you doing?” Chloe asked.

Rae flopped on her bed, “Nothing.” She sighed into the phone.

“Look, you should come out tonight, we haven’t see you all week and Archie leaves tomorrow.”

“I dunno.” She hesitated, she didn’t want to risk seeing Finn, she wasn’t prepared, she hadn’t worked out what to tell him yet. He wrote a whole list about her she needed to do something halfway decent back.

“Come on, Rae, please.” Chloe whined.

“What’s happening tonight then?”

“Chop is having a party, everyone is going to be there.”

“Like who?” Rae asked.

“Everyone, one last party before school starts up. Well, I doubt Finn will be there, he hasn’t been around much lately either.”

“Oh really?”

“Yeah, so are you comin’ or what?”

“What time?”

–

Sulking in the corner and drinking his feelings seemed like the best way to spend the night. Well, he did want to send Archie off with a happy goodbye so he pulled himself together enough for that. Wednesday was the last time he saw him, they were at the pub and he was miserable and piss drunk and when Archie got him home he told him everything that happened. To his surprise Archie wasn’t the least bit surprised. He doesn’t remember much else other than Archie assuring him that it would all work out and him mumbling about her wall, that she keeps up a wall. Which was true it would have to be her move.

–

She spotted him as soon as she and Chloe walked in, she had half a mind to turn around and leave but Chloe was pulling her to the kitchen for a drink. She poured them each a shot, which was needed. Heading back out Chloe went over to one of her other friends as Archie walked up.

“Alright?” he asked.

Rae nodded and sipped her beer, her eyes darted to Finn then back to Archie, “Where have you been all week?” he asked.

“Just busy.” She took another drink to keep her mouth shut.

“Not feelin’ in the party mood tonight?” he asked.

“Nope.” She shook her head taking another drink.

“Neither is Finn.” She just nodded to his comment.

Chloe walked back up to the pair asking, “What are you two talking about?”

“Oh, just telling Rae here about Finn being in a funny mood.”

“Oh my god!” Chloe groaned, then continued, “Anna was just telling me how he has been moody all night not wanting to talk to anyone. And the other day he was soooo beyond grumpy at the pub. I’m telling you if you thought you hated him before you’ll really hate him now, Rae.”

Rae looked sharply to Chloe and then to Archie who was wearing a sympathetic yet somehow knowing crooked smile.

Her shoulders slumped and she let out a tired breath, “I don’t hate him.” Rae mumbled as she looked at him, he was across the room sipping his beer.

“What?” Chloe asked, some shock in her voice.

“I don’t hate him.” Rae repeated, and just as she finished Finn looked over and their eyes met.

She immediately felt tears pricking her eyes, and then suddenly she was pushing her beer at Archie and moving towards Finn, she could hear Chloe asking her what was happening but that didn’t matter as much as what she had to do next.

Before she knew it she was standing in front of him, his eyes sad and glossy and his mouth slightly turned down. She couldn’t say what she needed to say at the moment but she could show him what she felt, she scanned his face only a second longer and then was grabbing at his shirt and smashing her lips to his. It only took a second for him to react, he was kissing her back with just as much passion and intensity. His arms wrapped around her pulling her flush to him, she moved her arms to wrap around his neck. She moaned and he growled in reply as the kiss went on. He bunched the fabric of her shirt in his hands and she couldn’t help but slide her fingers into his hair. This felt so right, she couldn’t deny it anymore and she wouldn’t.

It was him to pull away first, but touched his forehead to hers, he laughed lightly as did she. When she opened her eyes his were still closed, his lips trying to contain his tugging smile.

“I found your list.” She whispered.

His eyes opened locking in on hers, he scoffed a playful laugh, “Figures you would find it.”

“I’m happy I did. We need to talk.”

“Mine?” he asked.

“Yeah.” He kissed her, firmly and slid his hand into hers.

He led her through the crowd of people most seeming to miss what transpired between them and it made her feel funny, she realized no one seemed to care. Though she did notice Chloe with her mouth open and eyes wide and Archie with a beer smiling as he thrusted it in the air as if to cheer her on.

–

He had her hand in his and didn’t want to let her ago, afraid this was some dream he was about to wake up from. After they stepped outside and the door was shut he pulled her to him kissing her once more. He couldn’t get enough of her lips, or the feeling overcoming his body.

“Did you bring your car?” she asked between kisses.

He groaned against her lips, “No, because I’m a fuckin’ prick.” He muttered. She kissed him again. As they made their way to his they shared kiss after kiss which caused the walk to take longer than usual.

Stumbling into his flat he barely could flick on the light before they were all over each other. She was leading him towards the sofa but he wanted and needed to speak to her, to once and for all declare his feelings for her and hear what hers were for him.

He pulled out of their kiss and took a step back, she was breathing just as heavily as he was, her lips swollen and wet, and it made it so tempting to just go back to what they were doing.

His mouth opened but nothing came out, “I know..” she said, then took a breath, “We need to talk.” He nodded, happy that she was on the same page.

He held out his hand for her and she took it, he guided them to the sofa, where they sat as close as they could to each other.

Once settled they spoke in unison, “You go first.”

“You go, please.” Finn hurried, she knew most of what he felt from that note she found, but he was in the dark about her.

She took a breath, “Well, I don’t know what to say other than, I like you, as a friend, as more than a friend. All these feelings came on so suddenly for me, I didn’t know how to process them. I hadn’t realized some of the way I was acting..feeling, was directly correlated to what was happening between us. But once I realized it, it all made sense, it took a while to get there but it happened. And I’ve had plenty of time to think it all over, and I just…I really wanna say thank you.” She squeezed his hand and gave him the softest smile, it made his heart flutter.

“For what?” he asked with a confused smile.

She let out a shuttered breath, “Finn…you..” she looked away from him with a tears welling in her eyes.

“Rae.” He spoke tenderly.

It took a moment but she looked back at him, “You..you’ve helped me in so many ways…you wouldn’t even understand…and I’m so…I never thought I’d be here.”

“What do you mean?”

She sniffled back her tears, “As you know…” she let out a small chuckle, “I’m not exactly…thin or petite, and I’ve struggled with the backlash of it for quite some time, I’ve been bullied, whether it be people just calling me names or shoving me against lockers, I’ve experienced and heard a lot of horrible things. And I never ever thought anyone would take any sort of interest in me, and then you happened.”

Her mouth turned down, “I was ashamed, after it happened, I was…I thought it was the only time it would ever happen for me and was best to just do it, I thought I was pathetic afterwards. But then it kept happening and things, feelings were happening and I didn’t feel bad anymore, it almost felt like a silent victory, a big fuck you to everyone who said no one would want me for how I looked, I mean I know we were hiding it but I never believed it was because you were ashamed of me in any way, it just wasn’t anything that was anyone’s business.”

“I couldn’t ever… I wouldn’t…” he stammered.

“I know…I know. I just want you to know all that. And to also say sorry for staying away. I know that I put up a wall sometimes, but it’s to protect myself.”

“I understand that now. Those days where I didn’t see you..” he trailed off with a little chuckle, “In the beginning when we weren’t in so deep, I didn’t care..in the sense that it didn’t bother me not to see you all the time, because we didn’t get along and that. But as time went on…it was harder and harder to stay away, but I did because, well, for one it was usually me who fucked up and made you ignore me, but I didn’t know how to talk to you. Didn’t know what to say, or if you’d even listen…if it mattered at all. So I thought I’d just come see you at work, to see if things were okay again, and if they weren’t, as in you weren’t pulling me to the back to have a go, I knew I had to wait…and I didn’t mind.” He shrugged simply.

The corner of her mouth pulled up into a smile, “Really?”

“Well, I mean, I did mind because not seeing you rubbed me the wrong way but I had to wait until I knew you were ready….but I soon found out why not seeing you made me feel funny. Also, when I realized how much I knew about you, your likes and dislikes, when your house was empty, I didn’t retain that information for no reason, y’know.” He shrugged, simply.

“Also, the thing with Stacey, I were so upset because I like you, and I thought things were becoming more comfortable between us that maybe we were getting closer, I would never….I mean even if I didn’t have these feelings, I don’t, didn’t want you to think, I would do that…have multiple partners.” He mumbled.

She nodded, “Yeah, I know you wouldn’t.” she let out a breath, “I were just upset because I like you, I didn’t know that was the reason why just then but it made sense when I realized my feelings for you. Sorry again, for y’know…”

“S’alright.” He smiled softly.

Taking a deep breath then exhaling Rae mumbled, “So about that list…” her cheeks blushing in the process.

“Yeah..” he laughed lightly, “You were never supposed to find that…it was just sort of to help me tell you why I like you…ended up liking you.”

“It were an accident, picked it up along with my shirt when I snuck out that night.” She shrugged with a cheeky smile.

“I actually wrote it a while ago but added to it, a little bit here and there. And just before you came over I was looking at it. I guess I just needed to write down what I was feeling, what I wanted to say to you…I needed to see the words to make sense of them…of the feelings in my head but still couldn’t get it exactly right, it’s pretty incomplete.” He breathed with a laugh. “And..” he paused.

Rae nodded for him to continue, “Well, when I said that thing about not wanting to be your friend that night…well that was a daft way to start my little speech but it was a start but then one thing led to another…” he trailed off because she knew the rest.

She let out a little shy laugh, “So..so what are we then, where do we go from here?” Rae asked, hesitantly.

His eyes said it all, he smiled, “I think we should go to bed.”

Nodding she said, “Me too.”

Going to his room they pulled off their clothes, him only in his boxers her in her vest top and panties. After they settled into bed Finn wrapped himself around Rae holding her close.

He kissed her shoulder and murmured, “I’ll see you in the morning.”

“You can count on it.” Rae replied.

–

He was still asleep when she woke up, a sliver of sun shining through casting a yellow haze over his face. His freckles prominent and the gold flecks in his hair shining brightly. She was facing him, her head almost close enough to be tucked under his chin. His arm was draped over her and she could feel her leg over his.

She would have never ever thought she would be here, with anyone, yet she was and it was with Finn Nelson of all people. Not being able to contain it she let out a small chuckle. They were so annoyed with each other at the start, memories slowly flickered and she saw where things began to mellow. Not so much for her but for him, it was clear that he really did develop feelings first. She was so snippy with him for it too, when he would ask or know something personal about her and she would get irrationally annoyed, at the time she missed what was him showing interest in her in more than a platonic way, he started to really care. She feels a bit silly now, but thinking about it she had picked up a lot about him too.

Biting her lip to contain her smile she tucked her head into his chest. His breathing deep and even, she couldn’t help but delicately trace her finger down the slight indentation of his chest. She felt his fingers rub the crown of her head and he let out a breath.

“You’re still here.”

“Of course I am.” She mumbled, then placed a soft kiss on his chest.

“Never can be sure with you.”

She smiled into his chest while lightly pinching his nipple, he huffed a laugh through his nose. He nuzzled closer to her kissing the top of her head, “Shall we lie in a little longer?”

Her fingers lightly traced over his heart, and she soon traced out, Y-E-S.

–

“So you’re my girlfriend.” Finn repeated as they walked to the Swan.

“For the five hundredth time, yes.” Rae groaned.

“And I’m your boyfriend.”

Rae stopped and he was pulled to stop with her, “What?” he asked.

“Ask me one more time.” She mocked, annoyed.

“I just want to be sure.”

“Well, I am…are you?”

“Of course I am, Rae.”

“Okay then…let’s go let them know.” She began walking again.

They had another long talk when they woke up that morning; it was the second night in a row he got to wake up to her. The first day they stayed in his flat talking and discussing where they wanted their relationship to go. They agreed to take things slow, as there was still so much to learn about each other. He even asked her out on a date, to which she agreed to after she had a good laugh. But according to her it was only because she was realizing how adorable he really was, he still wasn’t sure if that was good or bad. The next thing he brought up, which he was hesitant about was to wait to sleep together. She admitted she was thinking the same thing, wanting to just be with and learn about each other before bringing sex back into the mix. There was a lot to still work out but this was only the beginning, they agreed they had all the time to get it right.

Walking into the pub she looked back at him with little smile, he squeezed her hand to assure her. The gang was at the back booth, minus Archie, Rae took lead walking them over.

“Well, well, what do we have here?” Chop sung out.

Rae slid in the booth Finn sliding in next to her. And then the next thing she knew it was like she and Finn were on trial, the gang all looking at them with varying looks: Chop wore a happy grin as did Izzy, Chloe looked confused.

“Well?!” Izzy squealed.

Finn looked at Rae and nodded for her to tell them. They agreed not to go into the entire story just what they needed to know, or what they wanted them to know. That thanks to Chop and Izzy they were thrown together more and things changed. That feelings had grown and so they were secretly trying to work out what those feelings were, and that there was a few times where they rowed. But agreed to work on their relationship which was now official.

Finn answered questions as best he could, Rae taking the lead which was fine, she had a better way with words. For the most part they seemed satisfied, he knows that there are some things that Rae will tell Chloe, he’s not daft, and some things that they all will connect sooner or later but they know that they will deal together as it comes.

The rest of the evening went by smoothly, he talked to Chop a bit while Rae talked to the girls. They left to the ladies a few times and she would wink at him and he knew they were probably talking about him, he just sat back and smiled. When the night was over, for him and Rae at least, they stood and Chop suddenly said, “Wait…Rae?”’

“Yeah..Chop?” she asked, confused by his sudden questioning.

“No..I mean…Rae as in Raymond!?” It was like all the lightbulbs went off in Chops head at once.

With blushed cheeks, Finn pulled Rae towards the exit with Chop shouting what a saucy minx Rae was behind them.

–

One Year Later

As Finn walked up to the door of his flat he could hear music coming from inside. Upon entering he saw Rae in the kitchen, he walked over to her wrapping her up from behind. She turned into him giving him a searing kiss.

“How was your day?” she asked, as she pulled away.

He nodded, “It was alright, long.”

Picking up her beer he took a sip, “How was yours? You been here long?” he asked.

“It was good and just since after work, I was not about to go home.” She replied.

He walked to the bedroom to change out of his work clothes. “Your sister still teething?” he asked.

“It’s horrible. I feel so bad for her. I mean I get why she’s screaming but there’s only so much I can take. Think it’s time to move out.” She called back.

He pulled his joggers on, “Why don’t you just move in with me.” He replied.

Looking through his vests for a clean one, she walked in asking, “What?”

“Hmm.” He hummed, looking to her.

“You want me to move in with you?”

“Why not? I love having you here and you’re here all the time anyway.” He shrugged.

“Are we ready for that?” she asked.

“Why wouldn’t we be?”

“I dunno. We’ve only been officially together for a year.”

“And?” he asked, “Rae, don’t over think it, it’s a simple yes or no. It’s not going to make or break us…but I do need to talk to you about something regarding living situations.”

“Finn…I need to tell you something.” tears were welling in her eyes, and she had no idea how he was going to take it.

“What?”

“I know we’ve talked about it…though not at length, and I was purposely putting it off as long as I could…but when I said the thing about it being time to move out…it was a gateway into telling you that I’m gonna go to Uni.”

His mouth fell but only for a second before he smiled and walked up to her, “That’s brilliant, Rae, you’ll be brilliant at uni.” He kissed her on the cheek and then walked passed her into the kitchen.

A tear fell as she followed him, “That’s it…that’s all you have to say about it?”

“I don’t know what else you want me to say?”

“Well, what about us?” she huffed.

“Rae…” he began as he walked back over to her, he placed his hands on her shoulders, “Again, not going to break us…I love you..it will be fine.”

“Don’t..don’t do that.” she huffed.

“Do what?” he asked, in confusion.

“Be!…Be so understanding.” She spoke taking a few steps back.

“What do you want me to say, Rae? That I’m gonna miss you like fuckin’ crazy, that I’ll hate not getting to see you every day and worry that you’ll forget about me…find someone better than me? Okay there I said it. But I love you enough to believe that we’ll make it and I hope you love me enough to believe it too.”

“I do love you!” she shouted.

“Okay then…do you know where you are going?”

“I haven’t decided.” She mumbled, “But it has to be soon, within the next couple of weeks.”

“What are your choices?”

“University of Lincolnshire or Cambridge…a few others but those are the two I’m deciding between.”

He started to laugh, “Rae. Are you serious? You got all worked up for that? So you’ll either be here or what..an hour away?”

She nodded, “It will be fine.” He said and walked closer to her.

“I have those same fears, y’know..you’ll forget about me and that.” she looked down.

“Not possible.” he said as he caressed her face. “But if you do think you can handle seeing me every day…I think I have a solution no matter which school you choose.”

“What?” she asked looking up at him.

“My lease is up…so if you want we can find a different place here or one closer to Cambridge or somewhere in between.”

“Really?” she asked her eyes welling once more.

“Of course, Rae.”

“I knew I was pretty sure I loved you.”

He barked a laugh, “That again.”

“Yeah.” She said right before kissing him and leading him to their bedroom.

–

Later that night their limbs tangled, Finn snoring softly behind her, she couldn’t help but remember back to when they first slept together, after they had officially got together.

It was a month after and they were innocently kissing but both knew it was progressing quickly. Finn pulled away but she pulled him back and told him she wanted to. He took her to his bedroom where he slowly made love to her. They shared little laughs at times fumbling over each other like it was their first time, but they found their way soon enough.

When they were done Finn snuggled up behind her, his arm holding her to him. She felt tears in her eyes, as she readied herself to reveal something to him. Placing her hand on his, she gently spoke, “Finn.”

“Hmm.” He hummed in response.

“I’m pretty sure I love you.” After she said it she held her breath waiting for his response.

“I’m pretty sure I love you too.” He echoed. 

Her heart swelled and she exhaled, “I’ll see you in the morning.” He murmured.

“Of course.”

She smiled to herself remembering how they made love again when they woke up the next morning.

Turning over to face him she tucked herself back into him, feeling more awake than ever, too excited to sleep thinking about their future.


End file.
